Olivia’s ROTDC!

What if Olivia really was there? If you’ve ever had the notion of wanting to hear what people would say at your funeral, this is one way to achieve a similar goal… if you want said people to be sarcastic strangers.
The ice cream was great! Meeting a bunch of Unilocalers was fun. And, now I can stroll up to the Jalopy and let them know they had me fooled on how to pronounce their name all.this.time. but not any more!
Seriously though, kudos on your ROTD and thanks for putting this together for us!

THE Unilocal GEOCACHING ADVENTURE
So, we found this UYE geocaching event on the Events page that sounded interesting. Here’s how it read:
***
«N 30º 14′ 57.2″
W 97º 46′ 5.1″
All sorts of flavors here you can lick.
Olive oil, chocolate, and even dick!
The cache for finishing this geo quest
Is meeting ME, so be my guest!»
–Olivia H.”
***
Naturally, this sounded like a gem of a geocache, so we all went.
I didn’t have my glasses on, so I thought Alison was the never-​met Olivia for a mere second. I also blame my de-​bespeckledness on the fact that I thought Jenny’s purse was a half-​eaten bag of Lay’s Garden Tomato & Basil potato chips.
Once we all arrived and saw that our cache — Olivia — was absent, we figured we’d gone to the wrong place, despite the accuracy of the coordinates.
And then we read the second clue, which mysteriously suddenly appeared…
***
«We had a ‘flat tire’ on the road.
I wasn’t gonna bail on you, but then I saw Camron’s load.»
***
Oh well, at least the rest of us creamed… ice-​creamed, that is.

Yo Olivia, I’m really happy for you, I’mma let you finish but I had one of the best ROTDC’s of all time. One of the best ROTDC’s of all time!

Hmmm a four or a five? I want to ding this event for the honoree and event creator Olivia’s no-​show, but I had a great time! I’m rather new to the Austin Unilocal community, and just started going to events, but I was told this was a pretty good turnout for a UYE, especially from an «unknown» Unilocaler. I saw some of my Unilocaly buds, and met a few for the first time, and it really was a cool gathering! Beth D even brought Beth D jr, and Mr Beth D out. Fun, fun, fun!
I should’ve had a Lone Star with the rest of the kids, and Olivia’s *ahem* flat tire, I think I’ll ding the star. But it was a really cool little event in the Horeshoe Lounge alley…

What if you threw a party and nobody came?
This was the direct opposite of that.
Damn it Lydia! You were so cute, and vapid, and the guy you were with was douchey. I bet you look great in the morning. If not, who cares?
Oh yeah, why didn’t we go to Barley Swine, again?

This ROTDC = Just a random swarm of Unilocalers having ice cream and beer
Olivia = Urban Legend /​Victim /​Prankster extraordinaire.
Camron = Suspect #1 (see ROTDC Thread)
Lick = Supplier of ice cream to accompany beer
Actual Location = Horseshoe Lounge
Actual ACTUAL Location = Driveway outside of Horseshoe Lounge
Most popular ice cream flavor of the night: Caramel Salt Lick
Had fun. Was confused. Brought baby to a bar, again. Oops. Went home. See ya’ll next time.
*****JUST REALIZED*****
Dammit, Olivia. I hope you know I just wasted my 99^th review on your (incidentally rather cool) ROTDC and now I’m suspended in Unilocal Limbo until I decide what’s cool enough to be honored by my 100^th review!!!
Good thing I had fun. ;-)

If you told me you could convince seventeen smart and savvy people who had never met you to gather at a specific time and place to lick expensive ice cream and drink beer, I’d probably say, «You cray.» But if you had also told me you’re the one and only Olivia H, I’d probably think you could pull it off — oh wait, you did.
But cool Unilocalers make the best of things, because we know everything is a potential Unilocal review. I hadn’t seen Rick or Alex in over two years, and Dawn and Andrew in nearly one. It was interesting to hear Mihir discourse on how we mispronounce the word «jalopy,» and Robert previewed his upcoming porn status updates for Facebook. Uh, thanks, guys. Catherine was cool and we all got a chance to talk to Mark before Hospital (okay, I like how the Brits say «Hospital»).
I did manage to finalize Friday’s pork extravaganza with Beth & Melissa, and a later engagement Friday evening with Nathan’s Chanel case. And heading to new seasonal pancake festivities at Kerbey, we were able to present a special trophy to Alison for her achievement as «The Chipotle of Austin Unilocalers» (okay, that last one is pretty much an inside joke, but trust me, it’s funny).
And finally, if I had a dollar for every time someone snickered «Barley Swine, Barley Swine» in my presence, I’d have twenty-​four dollars. I admit I may have taken a discreet stroll around the corner to see if all of us could possibly slip in there somehow, but they were truly jammed for the night and it wasn’t going to happen. So be it. And even though Jenny does carry a bag of dicks around — in that potato chip handbag of hers — she probably wouldn’t have let Barley pair them with a delectable foie in a subtle demi-​glacé — okay, maybe at Olivia’s next ROTDC.

What do Bigfoot, The Loch Ness Monster, and Olivia have in common?
.
.
.
.
Yeah, pretty much…

Most expensive date I’ve ever been on in my life. = 0 stars.
Getting to hang out with Olivia, alone, in my car for an hour without a bunch of smelly Unilocalers bothering us = priceless

Review of the Day Celebration where the girl doesnt show?!
This was awesome.
I drank all the beer at horseshoe lounge.
And didn’t eat ice cream.
Whevs.
Fuck this shit, yo!