The Cockpit

Say it with me now. Cock. Pit. You have to put that period in the middle to get the full effect. It’s hard to judge a gay bar when there are no «gay» people there as was the case last nite. The club was rented out for a private ROT rally party and from reading prior reviews it would appear that this club is struggling a bit with its identity. «The CP club»?? Seriously? When the coordinator of this party said it would be at «The CP Club» I was shocked that I, as a Unilocaler, had never heard of it. She went on to describe where the location was and I blurted out «Ohhh you mean THE COCK. PIT!» and right then I knew I had to go to check it out as this is one gay bar I hadn’t hagged in yet.
Unfortunately, even though our little party was, uh, little and they decided to «open up the club» to anyone, there were very few gay boyz in the joint other than the few behind the bar. Everything else was present tho. Typically high intensity dance music with a large dancefloor and light show, typically strong cosmos, typically asphyxiating dry ice, typically cute boyz behind the bar shakin they asses. Atypically they had a really nice girlz bathroom with actual stalls that work. That was nice and unexpected! Oh, and they do have a pool table that I didn’t actually play pool on, but it was pretty comfy to lay on. Could use some pillows or bolsters or something. Just saying.
I guess overall I was expecting a different sorta club and was therefore curious, but unlike the prior reviewers I do feel it’s just like Oilcans. Not that I think that’s a bad thing. Just typical.

When I want gay but I don’t want gay, here is where I go. Queercore shows rock my indie-​gay-​boy socks. They should do more.

Being a professional fag-​hag of sorts, The Cockpit (now known as The CP, that’s right, it’s an «alternative» bar, no longer a «gay» bar… whatever…it’s still a gay bar) is one of my favorite places to go. The writer below me happens to be my old roommate and we frequented this establishment quite a bit.
It’s true, their bathrooms are very clean and well-​lit, and they now feature lady dancers on Wednesdays… if you’re into that. Now, when I say «lady dancers», I mean lady dancers… ya know… for the ladies.
I’m not sure if the amateur strip show still goes on, but when it did it was indeed totally rigged. My aforementioned roommate stripped while pantomiming giving himself an abortion and it was PURE BRILLIANCE. And he definitely got the 2^nd most claps. Whatever.
It’s gotten a little busier since their transition from «gay» bar to «alternative» bar, but the place is still pretty vacant if you wanna get wasted, but hate people.
David, the bartender, makes strong drinks and is incredibly charming. A little bit too charming, but hey… we all gots to make the money.
Highly recommended. Nothing like Oilcan Harry’s or Rain, which I think is a good thing.

The Cockpit usually has clean toilets and go-​go dancers; and David, the bartender, makes a mean vodka soda. The amatuer strip contest is entirely rigged, but pays well. The bar offers valet parking on Friday nights and it’s far enough off the beaten path to avoid the monsters that frequent other gay Austin establishments.