Clinique

this stuff is great! if you want to look like a TRANNY HOOKER.
or your grandma.
but like if snookie, paris hilton, or kim kardashian are your idols.
then you’ve struck dock-​side hooker gold!
I’m convinced the eye shadows are designed specifically for a porn video shot with night vision goggles. (as opposed to beer goggles…)
like the one AND ONLY TIME i wore this stuff airplanes kept calling my cell asking for clearance to land. totally a buzz kill.
also, the products are cheap and not well made. Like when my ex threw my makeup bag across the room in a violent fit of rage the clinique stuff SHATTERED ALL OVER THE DAMN PLACE. really clinique, like. REALLY !?!
just spent a bazillion dollars on this crap in a pathetic attempt to gain some self esteem and have someone validate my neurotic insecurities. and you can’t even hold up to ONE domestic abuse incident?
funny thing. the estee lauder, prescriptives and lancome held up like a champ,
just sayin…
and oil based. this stuff is oil based which is completely horrible for sensitive skin or womyn of color. YA I SAID IT.
you constantly have to reapply. and it greases up like you making fries at McDonalds. (mmmmm. sexy)
and it doesn’t stay in place. because there is nothing i like more than the feeling of my face sliding off. that’s just so awesome. i was constantly afraid i’d have to pick it up in lost and found.
seriously, don’t waste your time. Just do like michael jackson and hit up Crayola for a sample…

This is a great spot to grab your Clinique essentials without having to brave a mall. The counter is always really quiet so you can get in and out — good for you, probably not so good for them. Instead of being salty that their commissions are probably low, the reps are always really fun chatty and knowledgeable, which I think is really important for any makeup counter. And they are not stingy with samples– my bag always has little added goodies in it– AWESOME!
There is one particular girl who works here that is extra funny–
Talking about cold-​cream-​like eye makeup removers, I mentioned that they can be the most efficient when removing lots of makeup including glitter. She immediately laughed and said that I must have gone out a lot in the 90’s. So it’s official– glitter is out. Now I know.
Whatever– you know you’ve worn some glitter out with your thizz face… goin dumb, getting it started. Not that Clinique would have ever supported such usage. Get your 3 step here to counteract all that damage ya did in 98.