Sprint Store By Wireless Lifestyle

I typically elaborate or fictionalize reviews for entertainment sake. The review that follows will not be fictionalized or alter from reality. I couldn’t make this up if I tried;)
Wife hates her Iphone 4. We didn’t think we were eligible for an upgrade but knew they had the one up plan so inquired about that. Turns out she could upgrade! We picked out a Galaxy S4 with the recommendation of the Chris the sales rep. He recommends an Ottobox case but I decline. He says he has kids to feed and that I should buy the case. Wife tells him he needs to say his kids have cancer or are in the hospital.
This is when a female customer storms in saying «I’ve been running around I-​70 at a hundred miles per hour!» Not sure why being that the store wasn’t going to close any time soon. The manager calmly says «you’re a speed demon!» She wants to pay her bill but is getting crabby about the $ 3 fee. I listen to them go back and forth about this for several minutes before she concedes. She goes off about her Iphone and how she’s not able to get an upgrade anytime soon.
She leaves and a second female customers walks in to complain her Iphone 4, possibly a broken screen. She wants the free upgrade but can only get another Iphone 4. The iphone 5 will cost extra. She says she wants the red one. Chris the manager says they only have pink. She shouts out «No I want the red one for aids!» and dashes across the store. I burst out laughing at this point. I could no longer hold it in.
The manager trails behind proclaiming they really don’t have a red one. Turns out it was a red case not a phone. Her disappointment was known by all as she stormed out. A male customer stood silently holding an Iphone 4. (see a pattern yet?)
He said he had received IO7 earlier but the phone had shut off and wasn’t powering back on. As the female customer slammed the door to leave, his phone just booted up. He didn’t like his iphone and wanted to upgrade to the 5. He asks if he’s. and gives a long pause. I yell out «Eligible to upgrade to an Android, YES!» Wife and I tried to get him to convert but he didn’t understand. Manager asked what color Iphone 5, he smiled and said «Red.» I smiled and yelled out «For Aids!»
Meanwhile this whole time the sprint employees are on a fools errand trying to transfer contacts off wife’s iphone 4 to the samsung s4. It’s not working, not even detecting the phone. One of them accuses the machine of lying when it says the contacts are empty.
Man gets his phone and they offer him an otterbox case. A story of kids in the hospital follows. I don’t think he bought a case either and I started to feel bad. Not for the kids but the employee because protective cases weren’t flying off the shelves. Older couple walks in and the lady says she’s gone through 40 phones in the last two years and wants to get a military grade phone that goes under water and can get run over by a tank. Employee Chris, notices she doesn’t have insurance on her iphone. Lady begins to rant and rave about how her husband «the money man» gives his son insurance but not her! She also says the phone was in an Ottobox case when she dropped it.
In walks the girl who wanted the «Red iphone for aids.» She declares «I’ve had an epiphany!
I plead with them to stop transferring the contacts. I’ll find a way to get them sync’ed with the dreaded itunes. I’d had my fill of crazy circus that is the sprint employees life everyday.