Ted Clark After Dark

Before sitting down in the dark room that smells like smoke with a beer in my hand, I wondered why Ted Clark After wasn’t taped — or at least podcasted. They’ve got all the equipment to do it — sound system, microphone, even a sound engineer in the back. It’s a pretty sweet setup.
Hooking up a camera wouldn’t be that much more difficult either and it’s not like their skimping on decorations. On Mayday’s stage, they have a real talk-​show setup. Desk for the host, red couch for the guests and even a piano for the sidekick. With the red curtain behind them, this really could be any talk show set in the country.
However, once I sat down and experienced Ted Clark After Dark for the first time, I understood why this could never ever be taped. Never. The show is so weird, so hilarious, so drunk, that it would seem like nonsense — stupid nonsense — if anyone was watching it from a computer screen. But being in the audience, and experiencing it for real, makes it one of the stranger and wonderful things Cincinnati has to offer.
Ted Clark is a comedian/​tattoo artist? I think I heard that. Every Monday at about 10pm (the show is called for 10pm but usually gets started at about 10:30 or whenever Ted Clark wants to) people gather in Mayday’s music room and Ted gets up on stage. He starts with a monologue, something random but very funny (last time I saw him he talked about autumn and girls that smell like mix tapes). He then brings local people up on stage — people who are working on projects or are promoting something or just people with things to say — and interviews them.
But these are not normal interviews. Oh no, these are drunken, sometimes angry, sometimes overly sentimental interviews where Ted both mocks and promotes his guests. Often times it will break down into Ted asking them random questions out of the blue. Other times it will break down into Ted talking about sex … That last other times happens a lot of times.
Because people are smoking on the patio of Mayday, the room will smell a bit like smoke. Not a problem though — this whole thing wouldn’t feel right without a bit of dirtiness.
This show is not funny without a drink. Hell, sometimes it’s not funny with a drink, but I guarantee it’s always entertaining. It’s free to attend and is amusing as anything out there. Take a Monday, come down and experience it. I promise, you’ll be amused.