Knight’s Inn

The room we had was clean. The hot water, AC, and cable worked. We had a parking space near the room. The room was near the lobby. There was a computer in the lobby with internet. They split our bill three ways without complaint. They had donuts and coffee in the morning. Plus the ice machine was clean and worked. We didn’t any other guests and didn’t go to the advertised jacuzzi.

I stayed here on my way out to Jersey trying to save a couple bucks. You really do get what you pay for. My room smelled like mold and the bed practically swallowed me whole. One of the worst stays I’ve ever had.
Room Tip: Stay at the Hampton Inn just a block away

I’m writing this review as a warning. Do not attempt to stay here. I know that it is cheap, but believe me, it is not worth it.
The Top Ten Noteworthy Things of the Knights Inn:
1) We ran into a prostitute multiple times a day.
2) Two very scary women approached our room one morning. When they realized that it was occupied, they turned and checked out the rooms next to ours instead to (most likely) do drugs.
3) We chilled out poolside. Unfortunately the pool, literally, is a very large hole in the ground filled with rubble and other miscellaneous items. We checked the pool closet for dead bodies. Luckily none were found.
4) A women’s trashy neglige and panties were discovered in the parking lot outside of the room. Near, but not next to, were used condoms and an abundant amount of wrappers.
5) We slept on rubber sheets. This slightly eased my mind, because the possibility of catching scabbies seemed less likely.
6) Our bathroom door did not fit in the frame, and a piece of plywood was falling off of it.
7) It took my friends well over a half an hour to check in. They were the only ones there, and the man was rather rude the entire time.
8) On a positive note, the inn is located behind multiple fast food restaurants. White Castle was a big hit. Too bad I had an absolutely terrifying man harassing me for money while walking there.
9) Before we went to bed, the toilet had to be turned off because it was running so loudly.
10) I had a wonderful time sharing the horror with my friends. Despite the accommodations, it was a fun, memorable trip.

1 Star = «Eek! Methinks not.»
That is so fitting for my experience at this place. It was like a scene from a scary movie, for real. SAW VI should take place here, I’m not even playing. The story goes like this, picture it, August 2007:
I drove out to Columbus, Ohio, to help out my mom as she had to go to the hospital for a (fairly) routine procedure. Anyway, my (at the time) wife wanted to come with me. Now, I already know she’s weird around my family, so I told her it would be fine if she stayed in Jersey — she insisted on coming. Well, long story short, she had one of her «reactions» while there, and demanded to stay in a hotel until it was time to go back to Jersey. So I look up hotels, found a few around $ 50/​night (money was tight, yo, and I don’t like to pay too much for irrationale.) This Knight’s Inn was one of those places — it looked decent online, and I’m really not expecting much for my money, just a clean place for her to stay and watch some cable TV until it’s time to head back to Jersey. Plus it’s on the route back, so it’s perfect.
We head out and it’s late at night. We find the place, right off of I-​70, tucked behind a fast food restaurant or two. As I’m driving back to the hotel, some seedy looking character is walking towards the car, trying to wave me to stop. Nah son, it doesn’t go like that here. I kept driving past, while mean-​mugging him, driving close enough to let him know I will let him know what it feels like to get clipped by a Pontiac G6 if he wants to fuqaround. We pull up to the manager’s office, and go in to get a room. Normally the wife would have waited in the car, but after seeing that dude, she wasn’t leaving my side — no matter how pissed she might be.
It’s August, and hot/​humid this night. There is no A/​C on in the lobby, if you would even call this hole a lobby. The front door is open for air though, but it really made no difference, except the flies were free to come and go as they pleased. I pay with my credit card and get the key and the guy tells me it’s all the way in the back, on the left. I go outside and realize this place is set up as about 10 one-​story buildings, forming two rows, going back to a treeline. I’m wondering why the room I got was way in the back as the place didn’t seem to be very occupied.
We get in the car, and as I’m driving to the back and see the treeline I’m thinking «WTF?» As I make the left at the end, I said it out loud. This place looked creepy as @#$%, I located her room number, and noticed the room next to hers had the window boarded up. Okay. I said, «well, you probably won’t have any neighbors.» To which she replied, «unless someone is squatting there.» I added, «Well at least there are bars on the window.» Her response, you don’t want to know. So this place was more like a motel, where you pull right up to your door. This place on the outside really looked like a shhthole, in need of serious upkeep and repair; I could only hope the inside was at least clean.
I opened the door to her room (she was too scared to at this point) and the inside wreaked, I mean really wreaked, of stale cigarettes. The odor was truly overwhelming. I turned on the light and the room was dingy, unkempt, dirty, stained carpet — even scorched in some places. Shower was filthy, toilet nasty, sink dirty — I don’t even think there were towels. The bedding was dingy, sheets had a washed out blood stain or two, cigarette burn holes in the comforter — I’ve never been to a place so bad. The walls were a mess, the lamp shade had been haphazardly spray painted, I guess so there wouldn’t be too much light. I was only surprised I didn’t see any roaches. The «free cable tv» didn’t even work, and there was no remote, just a few staticy channels available.
Being the man I am, there was no way in hell I was letting my wife, or any woman I remotely care about for that matter, stay at this place, I don’t care how pissed she was. I talked things out with her, and we got out of there. I went back to the «lobby» to turn in the key and get my money back — and the jerkoff actually gave me a hard time. I was only there like 5 minutes — and even I need more time to make things happen than that (haha.) He tried to act like he didn’t know how to refund the money to the card too, and I told him he was full of shht. He finally refunded my money after I badgered him about how much of a shht hole the place is for like 10 minutes. During this time, that seedy character wandered into the lobby, looked at my wife, and then looked up at me who was already pissed about getting my money, and he turned and left mumbling something incoherently.
On the way home we laughed, and she thanked me for not letting her stay there.