The Lancer Lounge

Lancer’s lease runs out tomorrow at 2 pm. Go pay your respects tonight, all:

Actually, I’ve heard it through the grapevine now that they’ve closed the kitchen.

I would rate Lancer 4 stars if it didn’t nearly ruin me every time I visit. I always feel like Guy Pearce’s character in Memento the next day. Who is John G? Why did I try to buy a Rascal scooter off Amazon at 4 in the morning? (You can only buy the batteries off Amazon apparently, bastards).
As noted by previous reviewers, the pours here are borderline ridiculous. They pour whiskey like the world is ending. I saw that they added food, but I would recommend sticking with a liquid diet. I sadly just realized that I don’t know if they accept credit cards. I’m almost positive they do but I can never remember paying with anything but cold hard cash. I’m gangster like that.
You will have some of the most interesting conversations of your life that you will never remember. Bottom line: Come here with friends for a tasteful Cap Hill black out sesh.

Hmm I have mixed feelings about Lancer. There is nothing I enjoy more than a shady, seedy, tiny hole-​in-​the-​wall dive bar with drinks that will make you grow chest hair and clientele that looks like it came straight out of a 1970s Dinero movie, but something has been off for me here lately. The last few times I was aggressively accosted by caustic douche bags (not funny or entertaining ones – those are fine) and the bartenders were a bit rude. I get they have this war-​torn, I made you this strong drink so drink it and shut up kind of attitude, but you should have toilet paper in both bathrooms. The drinks are so strong that you have a few sips and you’ll likely fall on the floor (take that as you will).
The jury is out on this one. Not that the owners likely know what Unilocal is and would care, but… the jury is out.

I feel bad for only giving four stars but the pinball machine was broken and the pool table charges by the hour, not by the game. Other than that, I freaking love this bar.
This establishment is an unapologetic dive bar, complete with snarky bartenders and wilting house plants. The management cleverly utilizes all available floor space, stashing rolls of excess carpeting under the pool tables and empty bud light cases in the hallway.
To say that the drinks are stiff would be an understatement. I ordered a beer and a shot of Jameson’s and was given a beer and a huge freaking glass of Whiskey, for like $ 9. Seriously couldn’t even finish it.
Apparently they do free drinks on Tuesday night, but we came by and decided to go somewhere else to avoid the massive crowds. Juke box is pretty rad as well, great selection of CDs. Love it and will be back next time I’m in Denver.

Solid 4 stars all around.
It’s definitely a neighborhood dive.
Do not go if you are expecting anything fancy (other than the doorman/bartender’s fancy suit).
Strong drinks, as in a glass-​of-​whiskey-​and-​dash-​of-​coke Whiskey Cokes? Hell Yes.
It’s a great spot to meet up with some friends, maybe play some pool, and get good and drunk in a T-​shirt and jeans.
Perfect low-​maintenance hang spot!

Holy Giant Shot batman!!!
Friend brought me here after I had already had a few tequila shots and 3 glasses of wine. BAD IDEA! LOL!!! I was pretty much done for the night after my first shot/​beer order (they sort of come together, reminds me a lot of the Midwest — not that I’m from there but I’ve visited a few times).
It feels like a neighborhood bar, very «dive-​y» and chill. Not trendy at all. Just lots of wood, old beat up bar stools and HEAVY drinks :).
Not much more to say… that’s all I remember. LOL! I’ll definitely be back and maybe I’ll START here instead next time ;)

Don’t get me wrong, this is not a clean place. Don’t go home with the men that hit on you here and I probably wouldn’t try eating anything. That being said, serve me a stiff drink and I love this place. This isn’t the dive bar that the magazines rank, this is a real dive bar. You will not find a place with more generous shot sizes or a stronger rum and coke. It’s a waste to order beer here but it would probably be a much safer decision.
On my first visit I poked my head through a hole in the pool table room and asked a happy grizzly bartender for a «rum and coke double tall». He laughed at me and said, «we don’t do those here.» That’s because most new comers have a one drink limit, two drinks make you walk a little wobbly and three might kill you.
Things you won’t find: Freshly showered people, a straight pool cue, girls in short skirts and high heels.
Things you will find: Strong drinks at unbelievable prices, down to earth gritty people, two pool tables (although they are falling apart), a patio and a new desire to carry hand sanitizer.
If you call yourself a «dive bar» kinda person– this is the real test. Make sure you are walking home or taking a cab (I’m pretty sure every reviewer gives this same advice).

This place has a great, old-​school jukebox and no one can skip over your music with some crappy club music. Johnny, Merle, Neil. They got it!
Kinda small (and divey, which I love), but I was there on a Saturday night and it wasn’t too crowded. Met some nice people and shared a table with them.
The only thing that keeps this place from getting one more star are the bartenders. Seriously. That’s all. They suck.
Might come back. But there are plenty of other places to patronize that are better than this.

Good god are those shots ridiculous!!! Of the countless times I have been here, each and every time it has ended with a giant shot and my night becomes a blur. I can’t say that’s a bad thing, but holy crap!
The clientele is always a mix of booze hounds and goofballs, the wait staff is always friendly and it has a great juke… What more can you ask for. Go here and prepare to leave tipsy at the very least!

Locals, check. Old men, check. Tatooed musicians, check. Alcoholics, check. A bartender that wears an Armani suit… EVEN BETTER. Yep this is the place.
The Lancer is a place that you want to go to get s**tfaced drunk. We got beers and a round of tequila. My friend had enough tequila in her glass to make her forget her name and have a 3-​some at the end of the night.
Don’t come here to check out the Denver scene. come here because you want to chill-​lax and get your drink on.
I am a fan of dive bars and the local scene and the Lancer gets 2 thumbs up. I would give it more stars, but I don’t live in CO. So I just had the one visit. However, I will be back and this is on my list mos-​def!
Also, it’s far from downtown… located on Capitol Hill so either make this your last stop and catch a cab or go home with a local.

One of the best dives in town! I don’t eat here, but I do like their drinks and vibe! They have amber bock on tap and their ‘shots’ are really just a drink made to order. I enjoyed a surfer on acid and a beer as well as the company of the other clientele this last Saturday night. They have a great patio and a decent juke and two pool tables. They remodeled the bathrooms, and boy was that needed! I dig that I could park at the bar for an hour sipping my ‘shot’ and then just skip over to another bar. Everytime I have been here, it as been a weird fun good time!

I’ll just say it, I go here to get a good buzz and then some. It’s easy to do, may only take 1 cocktail or 2 because they are so strong! Seriously, these are some of the strongest drinks I have ever been served. Watch out!
Lancer Lounge is a cozy little bar. The bartenders are really friendly and easy to chat with as well as the people who are sitting next to you. The jukebox is full of Jazz and the classic oldies but goodies. There is also a little patio out front that’s fun in the warm months.
Drink at your own risk!

Oh my my… the Lancer should give out coupons to Denver Cares and to the AA house down the road!
This place fucking rocks! The drinks… dude, if you haven’t figured out by now, these things can take the plaster off of your walls they are so strong! The, unequivocal, strongest pours in Denver… bar none!
Some have said that the service sucks… well, on the occasions that I have gone, Penny, Josh and the other cats there have taken excellent care of me.
The people going to Lancers are down to earth and friendly. Even if you aren’t a regular, go a time or two, chat up some of the people, and you’ll fit right in. I haven’t met anyone there who was a douche… so far!
Bottom line, walk, don’t drive, to Lancers. Call a cab, call a cop, or crawl home (or to Denver Cares or straight to the AA place). You can’t go wrong at Lancers.

This joint is ass kickery personified. When ever I visit my friends in Denver we always pop into this joint and get blasted. Cool folks, great drinks, laid back joint.

The Lancer Lounge is not like other gin joints. The mixed drinks are what I like to call ‘two-​percenters’. For example, if you order a rum and coke, expect it to have two percent coke. This is an alcoholic’s bar of the finest order, folks. High in value, low in moral fiber.
After mixed drinks, be careful before moving on to Coors Light specials. Similarly priced (read: dirt fucking cheap), but lacking in alcohol content, this experience beautifully illustrated every idiom I’d ever been told about beer consumption. I’d say it’s better to skip brews and go straight for liquor here, for the simple reason that most patrons don’t ask for 100 proof whiskey in their shitty beer. Most… but not all. Anyway, I digress.
Really, the Lancer Lounge is a glorified beat poets’ bar. You go there to drink, not much else. As I found out, you’ve got to be careful how you do it – the Lancer Lounge exists in some dimension that few other bars can begin to comprehend. So in order to get your money’s worth at the joint, I recommend coming in with a strategy. It’s easy.
Example Lancer Lounge strategy:
1.) Go to the Lancer Lounge ATM, remove $ 20.
2.) Head to the bar. Order four cocktails of choice.
3.) Drink one: feel an alarming buzz almost immediately. Grimace slightly. Ask «What do they put in this?»
4.) Drink two: relax, become social with other regulars. Ask unapproachable neighbor, «Do you come here often?». Exchange uncomfortable stares. Return to order at hand.
5.) Drink three: feelings of invincibility interrupted by confusion. Ask bartender what their shots specials are. Ask, «Where the hell am I?» Who cares?
4.) Drink four: head to bathroom, vomit profusely. Regret life. Quickly exit bar, forgetting to pay your tab.
1.) Return the next day to sheepishly pay overdue bar tab. Lick your wounds. Consume hair of the dog.
2.) Repeat first step one again.
See? Easy.

I drive by this place on the way to work in the morning and I always have the same flash back from when I made a stop here.
First off it was probably a year ago when I met up with my man friend… he wanted to roam to this place because it was close to his apartment… (now I know why… park car… call cab, or walk)
I had already been out and about, and was making this my last stop of the evening. I was still dressed up from dinner, and when I walked in to this place I knew I was going to stick out like a sore thumb.
So I met my man friend at the bar, and he already had my G&T waiting for me… awesome. Took a sip and instantly got drunk… Stiff Drinks!
I just remember when I ordered a shot from the hot bad biker looking bartendar, he asked me If I had been there before, and I looked at him and replied… Do I look like I have been here before? he laughed and just wanted to be sure I knew how strong the shots are… and he was right! (see above about parking car.)
total tab was under $ 20 for two people for almost 2 hours… uh Hello! Score!
I haven’t been back since… but one of these days… who knows when I might stumble on in.

It’s a dive bar. Nothing special about it. Just a friendly neighborhood place. It is small. You will be lucky if you find seating. The optimal place to sit would be in the patio out front, but that gets packed quickly.
Service was good… drinks were alright… It’s just a place to unwind and get your drink on.

Dude! As I sit here at the bar… How have I never been here before. We walk in, me and two ladies. Order a few drinks. Rum and coke to be exact. Lots of rum and a dash of coke. I mean a dash. This place rocks. Can’t deny this place is the real deal. What a great beginning to the night. I’ll be back for sure! Strong drinks and a no BS atmosphere.

I have to say I love the Lancer Lounge. It has all the qualities I’m looking for in a dive bar — cheap, stiff drinks (I mean like ¾ liquor), pool tables, Journey on the jukebox, tater tots and lots of strange, but friendly people.
It is true that the bartenders drink while working, but I’ve never had any experience where I had to wait for a drink. Mostly because there’s rarely more than 15 – 20 people in the place. And sure occasionally the only speaker that works will be the one right above your head, but hey it’s a real dive bar. Not like the dive bars you went to in college, more like the dive bars in a coal-​mining town.