Against All Odds

So … u know … I’m cruising the escondido hood known as Westfield Shopping Town with my teen and decided «hey. lets check out the gansta store, Against All Odds.» Not that Escondido is «hood» or really are there any real «ganstas» in North County … of course if you count the guys with their shorts around their ankles, asses hanging out with calvin klein boxers showing, grandpas dark ankle socks meeting the bottoms of their shorts, then SURE Escondido is hood. Anyway, so I’m cruising in the store humming, «shorty got them apple bottom jeans, boots with the fur.» No that song wasn’t playing but guess what, there really are such pants as «apple bottom jeans» Dammit I WANT AN APPLE BOTTOM cuz i thought I was pear shaped! So … I cruise over to the jeans and BAM. there they were! Apple on one side, Bottom on the other pocket. Sheeiiit! I’m gonna look so damn hot. granted my teen walked away from me as soon as i said i was going to try them on. As i looked through for my size I caught a whiff of something … «What the ???» was it weed? which could make sense cuz the store is all hood N shit but … O HELL NO… it was definetely body odor. damn. maybe this was a total ghetto hood like livin on the streets hood where people can’t afford to bathe? Oh it was baaad but I was determined to check out my new Apple Bottom. So … I went to the dressing room which was suppose to be like a makeshift wherehouse with graffitti … Bottom line … I have a booty… With Apple Bottoms yeah I guess I’d be noticed … cuz BAM!!! With the huge ass Apple on one cheek and Bottom on the other… Produce Clerks from all over san diego may sport wood but for $ 59 bucks and having to smell the stench of body odor. No me gusta, k? I got enough culo. don’t need a manzana… sigh … But i still kinda like the song «shorty got them apple bottom jeans, boots with the fur … «mmm maybe I’ll try to find «baggy sweat pants and the reeboks with the straps» then I’ll turn around and give my «big booty a smack» yyyyeeeeahhhh