Harris County Sheriff’s Office – 701 Jail

In 2007 I had the option of dragging out my case for over a year or take a 6 month plea… naturally the plea farm is a business in itself designed to secure conviction rate… I became a trustee (floor worker) on the 6^th floor with ALL KINDS OF KILLERS AND RAPISTS… I worked 6days/​week & 8hrs/​day for 5 months and 3 weeks… the guard assigned to the floor workers (Johnson i think) wrote a bogus review on my profile saying i was disorderly and uncooperative… so now when i grace the walls of this craphole they pull up a profile that is totally counterfeit and defimates my character… It doesnt say inmate freely turned himself in and worked for his majority plea sentence, in their eyes I am a risk/liability…Guards often had me slide food trays into opened doors as I went down the line of cells, I protested and would go inside their cells and place their food on their table; i was repremanded verbally for this… I dont believe people are dogs/​cattle and dont deserve food served on the floor, rapists, theives, killers, we are all Gods children and deserve humane treatment. Let the judge determine their fate, not the guards appointed to house/​monitor the inmates… Filthy, inconsistent atmosphere that NO MAN OR WOMAN SHOULD HAVE TO ENDURE

I have been calling all day to talk to one of my best friends who is staying here and they are always too busy have poor connection and they kept hanging up on me and were being really rude. They still haven’t given me anything besides please hold all day it’s been hours and they keep hanging up on me which is I’m pretty sure is illegal because legally I can have the information I’m seeking and I can talk to him legally also I’m very upset and they treat inmates like shit this places blows in my opinion save yourself while you can. -.- I wish I could give them zero stars and say this but oh well here’s my review.

Had to use a roll of toilet paper as a pillow, it was cold as hell and some dude kept wanting to spoon with me, ugh no thanks. There are better places to catch some Zzzz besides this dump. Don’t be cheap, pay for a room somewhere else even if it’s an hourly motel.

People trash this place and I get that but I don’t think it’s all of what they’re saying. Sure the food leaves a little to be desired and the service stinks but it beats sleeping on Allen’s landing over a humid Houston night. And instead of mosquitos to keep you company you have a group of your peers. You can argue about second servings or just explore the meaning behind their tattoos all night. Plus if you’re lucky enough to sleep on a floor with windows, the views of Washington street and downtown are phenomenal; I know people rave about the Chase building but the atmosphere really lacks the Houston charm that Harris county possesses. In summary, while the municipal building certainly has its quirks, I recommend everyone stay at least one night. Who knows you may fall in love and stay your whole life?!

SPACE PIRATE DISCRIMINATE!!!
I landed at this little shanty after dropping off a shipment of Quoatar Pluronium. I decided this place looked nice enough to put my moon boots up for a moment while my ship recharged. Zorks was I wrong.
first, the staff is incredibly rude, as if they’ve never read Lord Zulls Intergalactic Guide to Space Diplomacy and Etiquette. This was the first Spotel (space hotel) that was not politic neutral and the moment I declared my allegiance to the Republic my room was downgraded. CLEARLY Pro-​Empire. They seem to section rooms off based on race and gender, as I was only allowed to shack up with bi-​pedals of my own gender. Not a very fun way to start they stay.
Aside from being restricted to a female only Republic room, the food was terrible. We were served sandwiches of processed earth bread (who knows how many light years that took to get here!) with slices of what I can only assume was expired Tauntaun. The cookies were good. But pirates (space and sea) love cookies so I may be biased.
The medical droids need an update. They are your basic GH-​7 models. These are clearly units that were created before the bedside manner app was created for upload. Its a free upload so I still haven’t figured out yet why they haven’t managed to bring them up to speed. The bacta tank is free but it takes forever to get to.
Wampas also roam freely in this spotel, oddly enough. They’re tame, but if you make eye contact they can get testy. Do not ask them questions as they get extremely frustrated with being too stupid to answer.
They do hook you up with a sweet Rebel flight suit while you wait for your dry cleaning to get done, but if you’re leaving soon don’t count on it. after 32 hours mine was still not done even after placing it in the dry cleaning bag, marking it clearly with my name, and placing it on the dry cleaning rack.
Overall I’d still have to recommend Sidi Driss over this place. Even though the owners always smell like smoke the hospitality and climate is far more bearable.

I do not recommend this establishment.
Unfortunately I have had to settle with staying here more than once due to the price, it is definitely not my first choice.
Weird thing about it is that they require all of their guests to wear orange jump suits, I guess it is for sanitation reasons.
On the plus side they have really good A/​C, and free food (Bologna sandwiches with no condiments, 0% juice and best of all Graham cracker crusted peanut butter and jelly sandwiches).
Down side, like the other reviewer noted, you share your room with 20 or more individuals and they move you around constantly. Also, the pillows double as toilet paper and are first come first serve.

WORST HOTEL EVER!
The good thing about this hotel is that they will pick you up and take you directly to it, once you get there though, you are ready to leave.
1^st off, this is the dirtiest hotel I have ever been in! The staff treats you like, ohh, I don’t know… like you did something wrong!
When I arrived, it took 2 hours to get checked in, and while I was waiting around for my room, the fellow clientele I was waiting with were awful! The other people at this hotel waiting to get checked in with me were dirty, smelly degenerates that were obvious, frequent visitors to this 1 star palace.
After I finally got checked in I was moved to my room, or so I thought. After 30 or so minutes in my new large room with 20 other guest, I was moved yet again, but this time into an overcrowded elevator. Of course the elevator operator went to the wrong floor, prolonging this wonderful event. As soon as I got out of the elevator, I gasped for fresh air only to inhale the wonderful stench of, what I hope was, Lysol.
I soon realized that I was on my way to MY room and I was pleased, well, as pleased as one could be at this lame hotel. When I arrived at my floor, I was quickly given what I thought was a late night /​early morning meal (I would guess it was 4AM by this point, lousy hotel has NO clocks!) Absolutely starving, I open up the meal container to see what I would guess to be gray eggs, scrambled, a white, lumpy paste-​like substance, and a large piece of purple sausage. Don’t get me wrong, I usually enjoy trying new foods, but something told me to hold off on this particular meal. When I got to my room I realized that the front desk clerk must have over booked the place because I had to share my room with 3 other people.
Over the next 8 hours while I was «waiting to check out,» I realized something; I am never going to this Hotel again!
The service was way below par, the food was horrendous and the beds were the dirtiest things I have ever seen (surely it would fail the black light test). Worst of all, the price. About $ 5,000 for the night.
Insider Tip: RUN