La Bare

Epic fail! In from out of town, website says it open and when I call they say it’s closed! UPDATE your website!

We are in from out of town. According to the website they are opened tonight. After taking an Über drive we come to find out they are closed! How disappointing! Update your website when you are closed… Wish I could select zero stars!

This club is in a sad state. The place was empty on a Friday and we were asked to pay $ 25 to sit in on of the 10 empty booths. The dancers were not great and they wanted $ 40 for a dance, get a grip girls charge $ 10-​$ 20. So much for sex wage equality, am I right ladies?

I had so much fun great night. Cheap drinks and hot guys. Parking is 5 dollars. Guys are friendly and staff is awesome. Was a great girls night out.

The bartenders are RUDE. The waiters were great! The dancers were awesome. The place needs a fresh coat of paint.

Went for the first time on a trip to Houston with my sister this past weekend, and we had a great time!
Valet was $ 5, cover was $ 10, beers $ 6 and shots of fireball were $ 8…(average for strip club pricing, so everyone quit crying!)
The layout was confusing at first, but everyone was very polite & pointed us in the right directions!
Our waiter was super fun and prompt and the entertainers put on a great show!
We will be going back next time we have a sister weekend!

Disappointed. Run down and whack. How do you strip to «because I got high» that’s not sexy. The paint was peeling off the walls. The table that they used as a prop onstage had tape holding it together. The place needs a makeover.

I was there Saturday for a bachelorette party. They lost my reservation so we didn’t get anything that I paid for, no decorated booth or picture (except with a friends cellphone) and just stuck our party of 18 in the back corner where we couldn’t see. The guys had nice bodies and were nice but some weren’t cute. The acts towards the end of the night were RIDICULOUS! One guy got on stage in a E.T. (Like the alien movie from the 80s) with a dildo then stripped it off, I’m pretty sure there isn’t one women on the planet that found that sexy! My friend was brought up on stage with 2 other women and got a show by Bubble Bee from the Transformers movie, then when the actual stripper did come out he barely paid attention to our bride then took her off stage. I personally think he was upset because the people standing around the stage weren’t giving him dollars but he wasn’t doing anything for a $ 1! This place is ONLY worth the price of admission ($ 10) and ONLY if you want to have a good laugh with your girlfriends. I will never pay for anything extra there again because you don’t get anything extra.

The $ 100 package was NOT worth it! The «decorated booth» was a cheap plastic table cloth and 2 balloons. It came with a stage dance for my birthday girl, but she was one of 5 girls on stage at the time and only 3 dancers so she did NOT get any attention at all. Some dancer came up to our table afterwards and offered to get her more attention… for another $ 30. So THEN she finally got some attention on stage.
I then ordered shots for our table, which I was charged for and we never got. La Bare then lost my credit card for an hour, blamed it on me, and did not even apologize when they FINALLY found it. We were waiting around until well after closing because of their mistake.
The dancers were fun, drinks were actually pretty reasonably priced, and you can always stand around the stage with your girls and get attention, no matter where you are sitting as long as you have $ 1 bills.
Do NOT spring for a package or any VIP treatment. I did not feel VIP at all and cannot believe how we were treated when THEY lost my credit card.

First time & I will be going back!!! I candy on an other level!!! Nikko was my fave!!! Ahhhhh I’m still recovering from withdrawals!!! Lol great place to hang with your girls for GNOs.

I just went this past Saturday. And I had the BEST time! At first we were kind of leery since we didn’t know what to do. Once we started getting into it we couldn’t control ourselves. We were laughing and having a great time. The bartenders are terrific! The dancers are great! The drinks are pricey, but it is a club. Our waiter was very sweet to us. The only thing I didn’t like, is when we got up from our seat to go to the stage (like they told us to do) we lost our table. The place was packed and we had to change tables. They told us if a worker tells us we have to get up then we have to do just that. But other than that mishap, we have a great time and I will definitely be going back!

If you ever plan to take your bride to be or celebrating a special event. don’t order their package. It is not worth it.
The things they give you is not worth it! Don’t even drink anything from there! This place is disgusting.
The $ 100 package we got was a failed. The decorated table was just a table cloth. The $ 3 champagne you can buy at wal mart that is served in thirty champagne flutes. The group picture we never got, & bride to be didn’t get her dance or t shirt. And we all had to pay an additional $ 10/​person for cover.
If you think a gentleman’s club is dirty & raunchy… wait till you see the madness here… Barf…

It was cool… just a lot of them had a little sugar in there tank!

Where to begin with this…
1) Valet is $ 5, Self-​parking is $ 4.
2) Entry is $ 10
3) Any and all bills you give to the staff will result in change all in dollar bills. Go figure.
4) If your not into strippers, like me, have fun people-​watching. You’ll see tons of wasted brides-​to-​be, and desperate women pawing all over the strippers.
5) Water is $ 4, and you get a no-​name-​brand bottle. Ha.
6) Packages start at $ 45 to get your friend an embarrassing dance on stage. If your friend is a prude, be prepared to possibly get slapped in the face after. Those dances are beyond embarrassing with the strippers nuzzling their faces in your hoo-​ha and/​or dry humping you.
7) Or you can just get her a $ 25 package which gets her a t-​shirt and a poster.
La Bares really needs to update their stage. I was sitting in the front and noticed how old and looking their stage was. At least give the walls a new coat of paint and refresh the flooring. There was also a helper on stage who pretty much walked behind the stripper sweeping up his bills among other things. I get that’s his job, but it was unprofessional to just walk around while the dancer was doing his thing, and quite frankly i’m sure it turned a lot of girls off.

Unless you plan on drinking water, go on by and have a great time. My biggest issue with the place is the fact that the bartender and manager tried to charge me $ 4 from water directly from the tap! I am on medication that leaves me very dehydrated and don’t drink soda or alcohol for health reasons. I asked the bartender for a glass of tap water, not the bottle that he charged me $ 4 for the last time I asked. He told me, «sorry but if you want water, even from the tap, it’s $ 4». So I went and complained to the manager, thinking this bartender was just being a jerk and wanted to pocket my money by ripping me off, however the manager then informed me this was indeed the policy. I asked him «oh well do I need to pay you the next time I flush the toilet? I mean that’s tap water too…» just to get him to realize the absurdity of this policy that literally sells drinks at a cheaper price than tap water. ($ 2 Jell-​O shots anyone?) The manager simply told me «well i dont own this club and unfortunately thats our policy». Completely unethical and a horrible business practices especially considering the amount of drunk women who kept falling down and clearly NEEDING a water. Luckily a nice waiter heard my complaints and brought me a water for free.
Other than that, no real complaints. However, the tiling near the bar is messed up, causing a serious safety hazard. I fell and busted my butt while walking to the bathroom, even though I was completely sober. Surprised they haven’t been sued yet. I nearly tripped over the missing tiling section about four times.
The plus side, the guys are SMOKING HOT, very friendly. The dance routines were very cool, lots of men walking around the club and about 5 – 6 men dancing on the main and side stages at all times. I do take issue with basically paying dudes to try to force me to touch their scantily clad dongs, but hey, comes with the experience I guess. Our group convinced a few of the guys to come back to our party bus with us and we ended up all hot tubbing at my place until 7 am! We all watched the sunrise together, it was super romantic haha.
Overall, I had a great time. I just think this club is poorly managed, but the staff as far as dancers are excellent. It was fun getting to be in charge, and do a little role reversal from the typical bar scene of guys trying to schmooze and buy me stuff or get me to dance up on them. For some reason, putting a couple bucks in a hot guys underwear is very liberating.

Even though the dancers are great, the whole show is ruined due to the DJ’s stupid insulting comments throughout the night! He’s very rude and makes it very uncomfortable to be there and hard to enjoy the show.

Hahaha. Okay this review is from my first time here when I was 18. A friend at the time just turned 18 and we went here for a laugh. The dancers were okay. Some of themes are a little cheesy. One of the firemen grabbed one of my friends and took her into his dressing room (awkward!) We also got a lap dance at the end of the show… haha!
Couldn’t drink at the time but we did have to pay cover.

We had a horrible experience here for a bachelorette party. A package was reserved for the bachelorette for $ 319 that included a bottle, party decorations, and one table dance. It was reserved for a Wednesday night, a low-​key night right, you’d expect them to be happy to have the extra business for a Wednesday. Well when we arrived we were each charged $ 5 to get in, not too bad, I would expect to get in free for a reservation especially on a Wednesday, but hey I don’t mind paying the $ 5. At the entrance we were all IDed and because we were still waiting on a few important members of the group, the future bride and a few other girls and I were showed to our «decorated» tables. We were given tables near the stage, they were positioned awkwardly making it difficult for us to file in. We asked the server for a bottle list, not sure he even ever produced one. When the rest of the group joined us in about 10 minutes we ordered the bottle. Time kept ticking and we still hadn’t been given our bottle… we were like hello we need some alcohol, we’re trying to have a bachelorette party. It had been 45 minutes and I finally had it. The host had gotten up twice already to urge the waiter to please bring our bottle. So hoping third time’s a charm I got up and prompted the waiter to please serve us. He looked quite confused and I knew he was drunk already from the beginning because of the way he was acting and the smell on his breath, but you can’t expect much from the establishment. When I asked him what the hold up was, he looked over at another waiter looking guy and said «talk to him, he’s the boss.» As I turned to approach that guy he took one look at me and fled the other direction to the front. I stopped in my tracks for a little bit because I was confused if he really was a manager. I saw him and our waiter talking at the entrance, I let them be for awhile, then joined them to over hear the «manager» saying «well how many of them are over 21»!!! WHAT?! I was so irritated at this point. Then, I realized that this «manager» is clearly drunk too… oh man I knew we were going to have difficulty. His eyes were all glazed and frankly he didn’t seem like a real manager at all. I informed him we were all of AGE as we showed upon entrance. What the hell I felt like we were in the twilight zone. To lighten the mood I asked which mixers they ordered with the bottle and when he told me cran and pine, I said can we also have sprite please. The waiter looked at the manager and was like «can they?» the manager looked at the waiter and was like «that’s not a question for me, thats you!» I mean come on. So the manager brought us out a bottle, not the bottle we ordered but we weren’t sending it back, and our mixers. Thats it no cups, napkins, or straws. He returned pretty quickly with just cups and dropped them on us, I’m sure because he was tipsy or on something. No one served us, but thats ok. I’m used to a different kind of bottle service I guess. We had to nag for straws and napkins, we made our own shots, and finished the bottle as quickly as possible to get out of there. We were brought 3 tiny carafes, never seen them that small, and when we needed a refill of pine the waiter told me it would cost extra?! I was like for a $ 300 bottle, 1 liter of alcohol I mean you need a little more than that to finish it, but whatever.
The host had to put a credit card down to hold the tab obviously, but she told him not to run it because we were going to split it. When we were ready for it he brought over the check and had ran the tab on the card?! So then she had to get him to void it and we split it up. I mean this place was much more of a hassle in general than anything for this event, I think just hanging out ordering individual drinks it would be fun. It’s really dirty though, they need to do some spring cleaning. There were only 2 cute guys out of like 10, the rest I wanted to pay not to see dance half-​naked. NEVER AGAIN!

I love this place! I’ve never been so turned on in my life by so many beautiful men. It can get very loud with all the screaming ladies and music.
The first time I went I got a VIP pass to get in without admission cost the manager gave this to me after we had a conversation about my first time there. That was cool.
Don’t laugh at this but I was too close to the stage and one of the dancers grabbed my head to shove in his crotch and fell off the stage on top of me. HAHAHA It was so embarrassing.
I have a particular favorite asian dancer… Kelli damn he is hot. I got a lap dance from him and he was really fun to play with he had a great smile too *sigh* wow… I go here alot now.
Overall bring alot of your girlfriends and also alot of $ 1-​$ 5 dollar bills.

This place is awsome! The guys are muscular, athletic builds and HOT! The drinks price vary sometimes… I am not pointing fingers at anyone. The ladies in there are very willing to have a great time. The shows are great! They have private dance (which I never did). Lot of bachelorette parties. Well the parking is $ 4-​$ 5 and what actually suck is to seat close to the stage it is $ 25 ugh. But these guys are freaky, they spank ladies derrière, peak in their bras, grind on them, pop plastic balloons on their butt ah ah. Good if you want to people watch.
Great way to make friends and watch some hot men :)