Lure

I had heard Lure was supposed to be «a great new club.» So I went with above-​average expectations… okay, it was a Monday night, 7pm. Not the hottest club hour. But still… every word that follows is the truth.
The greeter was a cool guy and made me feel welcome. But that’s where the fantasy ended.
The «club,» if you can call it that, looks to be about 25 feet wide by 50 feet deep, with a bar and a stage taking up some of that space. There were two or three booths against the back wall across from the stage and maybe ten-​twelve small tables between the booths and stage. It felt like someone had set up a bar and stage in a hallway!
Oh yeah, stairs led up to a loft area… which looked to be about 12 feet deep by 20 feet in length. Lure is small with the potential to be CROWDED.
This night it wasn’t however. In fact, there were only two or three other people in the club… and they were the bartender, a DJ, and someone who I *think* was a dancer, sitting on a stool at the bar texting someone.
I would have hung around, but I was thirsty and couldn’t get a drink. I stood at the bar for a couple of minutes on my way in, but nobody was around — the bartender went somewhere and there was nobody behind the bar.
So I went and sat at a table in the «entertainment area.» I figured a server would come to me to get my order. I had my pick of tables, because I was the only person there.
When I say I was the only person, I mean the ONLY person — the stage in front of me was dark except for some flashing lights, and there were NO DANCERS to be seen anywhere! (Like I said, it was early — 7 pm — but c’mon… are you open or not?)
And… though I was the ONLY human being in that part of the «club»… nobody approached me for my order.
So I sat there, in the dark, by myself, with nothing to drink and nothing to look at onstage. I sat there for about 10 minutes… then I got up and left. What a loser experience. The high point of the visit was that the parking lot across the street only charged me $ 4.50 instead of $ 7.50 because was in and out in under 30 minutes.
Wow… did I feel «Lured,» all right. Luckily I got the hook out of my mouth and swam away before being reeled in.
Skip Lure… it’s not even in the SAME BUSINESS as Club Seville and Sheik’s/Downtown Cabaret, both of which are vastly superior in my opinion.

We came in here after a Twins game and gotta say that it was very clean, the girls were all very attractive, and they have a full bar. It had recently been remodeled and under new management. The owner was there out front talking to prospective consumers (I don’t know a nice way to say horny dudes), but this is the type of place you could see the cast of Mad Men frequenting. Only downside is that it is fairly small in size.

This club is without a doubt the winner of the «Sleaziest Club in Minneapolis» award. It’s got homeless dudes, skanky ladies, and a vending machine, just in case you get a hankering for some Cheetos while you’re eyeing up the merchandise.
If nothing else, you should go just to say you went there. It’s quite an experience.

I’ll echo the other two reviews and say that if you have a sense of humor and want to hammer cheap PBR long-​necks (a semi-​ritual for the people I went with) while scoping the most brutal strippers, ahem, exotic dancers, you can imagine then take the plunge. If only for one night. Oh and they know it. Have you ever seen the late-​night tv spots for this place? Well those must be their aces they call on when dignitaries and Charlie Sheen are in town.
The coup de grace was the point in-​between sets where the current dancer awkwardly wound down her song and another would join her on stage to begin. They shared the most twisted series of gyrations, giggling and pawing at each other while attempting to scoop up the jing that the sniffers tossed onto the platform! Then the grainy, oily voice would announce the next one and who was on deck… like karaōke night!
There isn’t much right about this place.

The skyway was the very first bar I went to when I turned 21 so I will always love it because it was the first place I drank alcohol legally. I will definitely agree with ninja that it is the nastiest strip club I have been to anywhere. I even once heard that one of their strippers only has one arm…

This is the skankiest nastiest strip club in Minneapolis. Believe me when I tell you that there is massive competition for this title.
The bachelor party ended up here for the climax (huh-​huh. no pun intended or something) of the evening. Completely predatory girls with knife scars and track marks are what this place is about. They have malt liquor, bud, and miller at the bar and possibly some other stuff that I would never consume.
It was the perfect end to the evening. Everyone was laughing their ass off when the groom-​to-​be was accosted on stage by three horrific women while Sir Mix-​a-​lot pounded in our ears. We all threw money.
It was perfect and glorious. He’ll be working it out in therapy for years to come.