Funny Strippers

There are some basic rules to follow in order to run your business properly. They are:
1. Prompt and efficient service
2. Completion of services ordered
3. Communication with your customer
What I actually got was a complete disregard for me as the customer. I got a big fat «F*** you» and was sent on my merry way.
A week ago, we ordered an overweight female stripper (dancer). We agreed on 8 pm Saturday for her arrival. On Saturday, one hour before the dancer was scheduled to arrive, I got a call from the company. I guess the dancer twisted her ankle at her last job and was at the urgent care. Would we like either a little person dancer or a female sexy dancer as a replacement? As an apology for the trouble, we had to pay a little over half of the original amount instead of the whole thing.
Well, fine. That kind of sucks but I understand these things happen and can’t be helped. We tell them send whoever is available as soon as possible.
Our replacements called to confirm they were on their way. Yes, I did say «they»! Lucky for us, we get TWO girls!
So why am I so upset?
First, because they were THREE HOURS LATE. We were scheduled for 8 pm. They got there after 11 pm. Do you know how ridiculous that is? I can understand some delay, but THREE HOURS is not okay, especially when we said give us whoever is available. Are you honestly going to tell me that after you sent me SIX pictures of different girls (and the ones we got weren’t even ones I got pictures of anyway), the only ones available were ones coming from Palmdale and were three hours late? What if we had been at a rented venue where our time was up? Come on.
Second, there was hardly any communication. Our original overweight dancer didn’t bother to call us and let us know she wasn’t coming. The replacement dancers did call once that I missed due to my phone being stupid. I’ll give them that. But her voicemail said, «I will call back in about 5 minutes to try and get you again.» I didn’t get another call until almost an hour later. Fine. When they finally got there, I was asked what we wanted. Did we want them to stay in their bikinis, topless, or full nude? I specifically requested either topless or full nude.
They completely ignored that after giving me the option. What the hell is the point of asking me if you’re just going to turn around and ignore what I said? So they stayed in their bikinis the whole time. But to add insult to injury, and what truly pissed me off, was that they stayed for TWELVE MINUTES. They didn’t even fucking make it a full 15. I don’t understand how you can justify that when we paid for AN HOUR. That’s insulting.
And probably the worst part is that they DID try and justify it. Their reasoning was that they work off participation. Since no one ordered lap dances, that meant their job was done. So you’re telling me that in order for you to DO YOUR JOB, you need us to spend an extra $ 20 per person? That’s utter bullshit.
It was incredibly unprofessional. I gave them the benefit of the doubt so many times and I was screwed over. This company was continuously incompetent, they were unethical, and downright rude. Trust me when I say I’ll make sure everyone knows how atrocious their business practices are.