Hobos on Overheard

Several years ago I spent about a week in New York City. To remind myself of how badass it is I go to the web site Overheard in New York. The best part of it is any conversation which incorporates hobos (the sites semi-​PC term for homeless people). Some hilarious examples:
*Hobo: Yo, yo, you think you got problems? I’m homeless! I ain’t got no money, I ain’t got no food, I’m hungry! I ain’t got nothin. You think you got problems? Yo, what’s your problem?
Guy: I’m in law school, I have finals.
Hobo: Sorry, that’s rough.
*Hobo: Can you spare any change?
Man: Sorry, no.
Hobo: Who the hell you saying no to? I wasn’t asking you anyway, asshole!
*Bag lady: This guy killed my boyfriend!
Hobo: No, I didn’t! Not directly!
Bag lady: He gave him vodka so he fell into a bus!
*Hobo #1: What flavors you got?
Clerk: We have regular, orange, raspberry, and vanilla.
Hobo #1: We’ll take vanilla.
Hobo #2: Vanilla? What are you, gay?
*Hobo: Miss, you dropped some change… Miss, aren’t you gonna pick that up?
Catholic School girl: They’re all facing tails!
Hobo: Shit!
Thanks, hobos! Keep up the good work.