Gopher Bargain Center

Mrs. Carnivore and I embarked on an adventure, and accidentally tripped over this place. This was a most fortunate occurrence, as it was the place I was trying to find to show her anyways. Gopher Bargain Center is part flea market, part unclaimed freight, part antique shop, part furniture store, and part complete randomness.
Lawn mowers, fishing gear, bedroom sets, hot tub, flour, drain cleaner, cards, cookware, toaster ovens, Eggo waffles in strangely damaged boxes, a wrench big enough to undo the nut on the bolt that holds planet Earth together. These are merely the beginning of the delights found within this building. A trip inside will make you smile at the complete randomness of it all. Bathroom and kitchen fixtures, including the kitchen sink.
You might, with enough imagination, be able to build and fully equip and furnish an entire house with the items in this store. That statement, though true at the writing of this review, may well change drastically as early as tomorrow.
The Carnivore understands that there is an activity known as «scrapbooking,» which he does not understand, but acknowledges the existence of. He is still stunned at the magnitude of items available at this establishment for this purpose. He figures that putting snips of things in a book pales in comparison to putting a steak in his belly, but to each, his own.
There are curious smells in various parts of the store, too. some food-​like, some solvent-​like, some of completely unknown origins.
All kidding aside, I promise you there is something here you want, or maybe even need. The entertainment value of wandering around and occasionally saying «What the hell!!!» is worth a couple hours of your time. You just need to come here and walk around until you find it. As a side note, I believe in my heart that there are no more 75 watt incandescent light bulbs left in the store. I could, however, be wrong.
Give it a try, but I would definitely be cautious about food items that are not obviously sealed, and even those, I would definitely wash the exterior of before opening. There are too many non-​foods here to completely trust unsealed items.

Don’t miss this one-​of-​a-​kind place! Whether you want bargain basement toothpaste of feather pillows, Gopher probably has it.