Pet Expressions

Tucked in behind Smyrna’s Market Village, all of the dog-​walkers in Smyrna were excited when we saw that a pet store was going to be opening in our back yard! Little did we know that we were in for so much more!
So you walk in Pet Expressions and you realise that not only do they offer pet grooming and a SMALL selection of pet food and toys on one side, but, by God, they also offer flower arrangement IN THE SAME STORE! Brilliant! Not only can you get your dog bathed but you can pick up a lovely bamboo plant while you wait!
What in the hell is that about?! Obviously someone didn’t go to Harvard to learn to write that business plan!
So anyway, I have to get my dog bathed and I drop him off with no notice which was fine with them since they’re new and didn’t have much business. The cost was good ($ 20 for a first-​time visitor) and I didn’t have to wait too long. The problem was when I came back. I show up and here comes my dog with some ratty-​ass bandana tied around his neck! Now I know that PetsMART (which I love) does the same thing but at least their’s is branded with their logo. THIS bandana looked like something that my grandmother would have had in her fabric scraps to use for quilting and the church social!
I wouldn’t have that crap in my house much less around my dog’s neck so I borrowed their scissors and cut it off and made a mental note to ask for «no ugly bandana» the next time.
So the groomer comes out and tells me how good he was and how she…(are you ready for this??)…EVACUATED HIS BOWELS! What!!! You did WHAT to my dog WITHOUT MY PERMISSION?! Yeah, apparently she shoved some water hose up my boy’s bum to clean him out! Are you kiddin’ me?! You don’t do that crap without telling someone first! Now, when I take my boy to PetsMART, they don’t pull that crap (no pun intended) so what made her decide to do it without my permission?!
I decided right there that I’d made my last visit to Pet Expressions regardless of how convenient it may be. I’m very protective of my dog and NO ONE will be performing invasive procedures on him w/​out my knowing about it first!
I can go to PetsMART in the future for the bath and can’t think of a time in my life when I’ve needed an ugly Lucky Bamboo Plant but if I do, I’ll find it somewhere besides the pets store!
UPDATE: 9 July 2007… While walking my pooch last week, I was stopped by two of the (frantic) owners of Pet Expressions. They asked if I had seen a particular type/​color of dog that had apparently gotten loose and ran out the door and was LOST?!
DO NOT TAKE YOUR PETS TO THIS PLACE! Any groomer that doesn’t provide for the safety of your pet doesn’t deserve your business!!!
UPDATE: November 8, 2007 … Asian lady that owns this place (affectionately known as «China the Butt» to the locals) apparently lives in the back of the store probably to save money or something. I don’t even want to think about how/​where she bathes. I think I just puked a little in the back of my throat. DIS-​GUS-​TING!