Simple To Elegant

This will be the most epic takedown of «Pimple To Fail-​egant»…
My wife laid out the blueprints to a wedding that was so beautiful, Kanye West thought about renaming himself after them. Part of this masterpiece was an archway made out of sticks and one that gave off a natural feel, very Lord Of The Rings stuff here. The archway was going to have natural lighting throughout it to give it a pop. My wife paid a lot of our hard earned money not only to rent this arch, but have it delivered to the wedding site. This was set up and paid for MONTHS before the wedding…
TWO DAYS BEFORE THE WEDDING. TWO. DAYS. My wife wakes me up, freaking out. Thinking she just murdered someone, and as I’m trying to work out the alibi in my head, she informs me Pimple To Fail-​egant called her to tell her the archway had to be destroyed because it was falling apart (Obviously, the archway wasn’t in good shape when we paid to rent it, but they failed to tell us that when we placed out money in their hot little hands).
Now, this is where it gets comically insane. They informed my wife they had an archway, however, it was bigger than what we paid for. After they inform her this, they tell her they don’t have a truck that can haul it to the wedding, and tell her if we want it, we’ll have to come pick it up. It’s not like we’re busy two days before the wedding, or have family coming in from out of town. I’m surprised they didn’t tell her when we came to get it, that we had to cross a moat full of alligators just to add to the excitement…
So my wife is freaking out and I start Googling «How To Waterboard», I pause. I take a deep breath, calm my wife down, and decide to go with her to their office to look at this archway and decide if it’s going to work. It’s not like we can do much about it now. They have us by the short and curlies and they know it. They’ve been in the business for a long time, and I’m sure this isn’t their first rodeo. So my wife, her mother, and I venture down to the building. We meet one lady, can’t remember her name but she’s part owner of Pimple To Fail-​egant. She can obviously tell we aren’t happy. Guess what she does?:
A. Apologizes the entire time, and agrees to new terms in the name of good customer service.
B. Never apologizes. Never offers any restructured deal. Never accepts responsibility for putting us in this situation.
If you guessed «A», you haven’t been paying attention. She keeps pushing this line «Well, there’s nothing we could do. We don’t have trucks that can haul it.» She keeps repeating this. Over. And over. And over. Apparently, she’s a sorcerer that thinks if she keeps repeating this, it’ll put our minds at ease and we’ll start whistling Dixie out of our butts.
If that’s the case, she about as good of a sorcerer as she is a businesswoman and we’re still upset. I’m about to inform her repeating the lines over and over may help her sleep at night, but it doesn’t help us when this hummingturd comes fluttering in. His name is Jeff Winchester. I’m not going to allow him the last name «Winchester» because Winchester is a respected brand in the field of firearms, and Pimple To Fail-egant’s Mickey Mouse business plan couldn’t hold a candle to a respected business like Winchester. So we’ll just call him Jeff.
What Jeff did next I will never forget. The archway wasn’t going to have the lights weaved through it like the original one we had planned on getting, so in addition to everything, we were told we had to insert the lights ourselves. My wife, who had maintained a very professional attitude despite all the hiccups, asked Jeff how to do it (Because they weren’t even going to go over it with us). Jeff, very rudely, pops off «Well, it’s really simple…» implying we’re the idiots. I had to walk out of the room. It still makes me mad to this day to think about those words coming out of his mouth.
Pretty screwed up, right? It gets even better. The gloves start coming off. My wife asks Jeff if there is going to be any type of discount in light of all this being sprung on us. Jeff pops off «Well, we’re not charging you the delivery fee.» Really? You’re not going to charge me for us having to haul it to and from the wedding venue? How thoughtful. You’re a saint amongst us peasants!!!
Luckily, my father-​in-​law returned it back to the yellow pus-​colored house they work out of on 3^rd St. I originally intended on putting the lights in a bucket and hanging it from a tree on their property. Luckily, we had a plane to catch and memories to shed on our honeymoon of Pimple To Fail-​egant.
If anyone were to open a business in the wedding venue and décor department similar to them in the Wabash Valley, and had half a brain and better customer service, I guarantee Pimple To Fail-​egant wouldn’t be in business long. Avoid them like EBOLA.

Sorry to hear the other reviewer’s experience. We had a great experience to S-​to-​E. We picked the arrangements up ourselves, which, in retrospect, was probably a bad idea. Our venue sat everything up. We got a lot of compliments and it looked fabulous. Very easy to deal with, even when it was with different staff members.
Thank you!

Worst Wedding Vendor Ever. Jeff Winchester is rude, smug, and basically has an awful personality for the wedding business. He was mean to a lot of my family and most of the wedding party on the wedding day (he was nice until we gave him a final payment). Left behind most of my decorations, many I was very clear I told him I wanted. Set up the reception room wrong even though I gave him blueprints. Put many decorations in the wrong places even though I was clear in communication with how I wanted things where. Awful company. Terrible experience I wish I could erase from my memory of my wedding day. I would not recommend this company to my worst enemy. DO NOT BOOK THESE JERKS! NOT ONLY ARE THEY BAD VIBES TO HAVE AROUND ON YOUR WEDDING DAY BUT THEY DONT DO THEIR JOBS RIGHT AT ALL.