Club Turbulence

Know why the club is named this way. Apparently they think nothing of clients witnessing fights between the bouncers and the strippers. We saw the bouncers manhandling the girls and physically drag one back into the club. Was looking for something fun and different, but wasn’t exactly looking to be on the next episode of Cops.

Okay… I’ve been meaning to Unilocal about this place for awhile now, so let’s get this done. I first strolled into Turbulence about three, maybe four, years ago. The place was managed by somebody else at the time. It’s my understanding that it has recently been under new management.
The place, three years ago was pretty dang ghetto. I blame the location, might as well have been in Mexico. Gang members and all kinds of weirdos used to show up there. I even think one person was shot there too. That time has passed.
Fast forward to now. The club has changed to 21, rather than 18. Also, I believe it’s topless. They now serve alcohol and have renovated the place. The last time I was in there, a few a months ago, the place was running pretty well. The line up was not bad at all. You have your usual perfect 10s, then your 8s, then your 5s, and then those girls who make you go, «you’re a stripper?! BUT HOW!?» But hey, whatever floats your boat, sinks another man’s boat.
Now, I’m a fan of strip clubs. I’ve been frequenting them since I was 18 and still continue to this day. Obviously this place is nothing compared to the strip clubs that you’ll find in Phoenix like Christy’s or Le Girls. BUT for being a Tucson club, this place is pretty dam sweet. If you’re ever looking to hit up a strip club, I’d recommend this place over all the rest. Curves Cabaret is just flat out ghetto. Too many drunk chollos and wannabe ballers over there. The old bunny ranch is gone and thank God for that. That place was like a high school prom party in some dude’s basement. I think Bunny Ranch is now Eden? Not sure. But after my last and only visit to Bunny Ranch, there’s no way that place can be saved even with new management. I’m pretty sure Satan and Osama managed it.
Anyways, Turbulence has definitely seen a lot of improvement over the past year. I do have a few complaints though. The girls need to offer better customer service. A lot of them do their thing on stage then go into the backroom or just stand around and talk to the DJ or bartender. The bouncers are a bit creepy. I was getting a lapdance from one of the girls and this one black dude with a clipboard just stared me down. Not sure what his problem was but it made me uncomfortable and I almost didn’t enjoy my lapdance. I went to the bathroom at one point and walked in on three dudes doing lines of coke off the sink. Also, I knew one of the strippers that night and things got kinda awkward, but that’s not the club’s fault. Also, the drinks were not mixed well. My rum and coke tasted like diet coke, not much of a kick.
I didn’t get a chance to do VIP, but next time I’ll get it done and provide an update. The cover is your typical price. The drinks are also reasonably priced. I can definitely see this club making a good name for itself in the future. For now though, I’m a just a fan, not a fanatic. Four stars. Stay vigilant people.
–Joey Rockafella

Lee S., you’re my hero. Just had to put that out there.
Club Turbulence is known as the «Airport Strip Club»… guess why? Just a few blocks from Tucson International Airport. What does this mean for you? Lots of sleazeballs looking for a little somethin’ on the side while on layover from their business flight to L.A. Fair enough, everyone deserves a little pleasure.
That being said, I did have a fun time at Club Turbulence. The music was loud, your typical grind-​your-​booty type, would like to hear a little rock’n’roll to switch it up. Theme night, Turbulence?
The attractiveness of the girls really, REALLY varied. There was one with curly hair who was seriously talented and I couldn’t take my eyes off of her (I’m straight). I considered going up stage-​side for her and her only. The rest alternated between your typical size F plastic-​surgery vixen and your pre-​pubescent boy-​frame. There is NOTHING WRONG with either of these, but I must admit, I’d prefer a little more «average» body frame. Speaking of attractiveness, there was one «woman» who I’m not really sure was such… either that or «she» had a terrible plastic surgeon. No offense, trying to keep it real. Keep your eyes peeled.
Drinks were a little weak-​sauce, would recommend pregaming or expect to spend a little extra on drinks.
VIP room. Haven’t been in there, but they have it.
If you’re a girl, strip clubs are full of men willing to buy you drinks, lap dances and so on. Everyone has their own reason for going. My simple rule on strip clubs: go if you feel like, don’t if you don’t. Simple as that. It’s entertainment.

Well i’ve been to most of the strip clubs in Tucson, and while this isn’t the best, it’s definitely not the worst. Went here on a Friday, paid $ 12 for me & my friend which was decent. Asked the cashier if they served alcohol & she replied ‘YES, just recently started a month ago!’. So we happily walked in, saw two stages, sat near the main stage. This club is pretty much set up to look like a strip club you’d see in the movies, cool music, hot girls, high stage, hipsters & wannabe gangsters «making it rain», faux girl on girl action, friendly waitresses, good drink prices, and not a lot of dancers constantly bugging for a lap dance. All in all I had a fun time!

Well, Lee S. review was good for entertainment but not much help if you actually ENJOY frequenting these types of establishments. I went in about 8:30 on a Thursday night. There was one other customer there at that early hour. Cover is $ 10 and they require that you buy one drink (non-​alcoholic) which ended up being a $ 4 bottle of water for me. I thought that all of the dancers were at least «cute» with some of them being pretty hot. A buck stageside gets you a look at the coin purse. VIP dances are $ 20 for topless and $ 30 for nude. The only drawback is the «no touching» rule (for customers) so $ 30 is a bit steep IMHO. The place was clean and most everyone was friendly. I stayed about an hour and dropped a C-​note and enjoyed myself.

Ok… why do straight bosses think it’s a great idea to take three married men, a bi-​guy and a 112% gay guy to a strip club?
While I was the only one that didn’t «sprout» from the occasion, I can review the place with a clearer focus because my eyes weren’t covered by a zipper.
Why do straight guys like to get together to look at naked women thrusting their anatomy lessons at them, then walk around with their systems activated and antennae raised high when they can’t do a thing about it until they get home… or at least the car… or that dark corner… ugh, I just realized why all of my «friends of cleaver «vanished for most of the night. Clean-​up in aisle three!
It didn’t bother me because I’m gay. It bothered me because, as a nurse, I felt like I was back in anatomy class seeing things that were NOT in the book. Honestly, next time I need an anatomy refresher, I’m coming here. There were no parts that weren’t stuck in someones face… or mouth… Do you get extra credit for tasting? In my head it was like …
thump thump (labia minora) thump thump (labia majora) thump thump (ovary) thump thump (cervix). Repeat.
I felt like I should be taking notes and counting genital warts.
There was a $ 10 cover at the door and a one drink minimum. Soft drink that is. Why bother? Alcohol would make wallets open wider. so I’d understand that but soft drinks? Just charge $ 12 and be done with it! (In Tucson you can have nudity or alcohol… not both)
The place was only marginally clean… and that’s as observed in the dark. Our table was never cleared of the empty bottles from before us and during our stay.
The girls were all tiny, impish, elves. This made the one girl that still eats look chunky. Poor girl. Thin in society, fat in the strip club… where can she fit in?
The whisperings of drugs and prostitution caused my belief that women could strip without lowering themselves to hit turbulence and crash. Sad. I sat there wishing I could fix their lives and then along comes… thump thump (fallopian tube)
If you are hankering for a look at a naked elf this place is
A. cheaper than anatomy class,
B. wanded for weapons to keep you safe.
C. zambonied so your shoes don’t stick to the floor.
So, I guess it could be worse.
Have fun. But tip well and be polite their life is probably a lot worse than yours.