Top Secret Incorporated

If I could give 0 starts I would. A tourist trap, plain and simple. Don’t waste your money.

Even at $ 5 it is waste of time… A few rooms with stuff on the ceiling… seriously that’s it

Only $ 5 now!!! Which is only $ 3.50 over priced.
Ha! It’s actually not a bad deal at 5. If a big family I would drop the dough.
Walk around, look at shit nailed to the ceiling.
That’s about it.

In 2009, Top Secret was a tour led by a guide. The quality of your guide made it either a really great experience, or mediocre. A few years later, they had cut costs by eliminating the tour guides. Now, you just walk through a bunch of upside down rooms. There are a few triggered scenes that make noise or shoot air, but many of the great details are now lost without a guide to point them out.
Did you read all the crates? Did you notice the backdrop that was used to film the fake moon landings?
Some cool things from 2009 are completely gone. The «maze» has been removed, and you no longer encounter the huge dinosaur-​type creature or the rock creature. (The rock creature appears to be chained up outside of the Lost Temple.)
For $ 5, it’s a cool walk through, but adjust your expectations accordingly. It’s very cool to see all the upside down rooms, but it was much better even with a bad tour guide.

What in the ??? Picture if you will a set for a live action play, but no actors showed up. Perhaps you went off-​season and didn’t realize there’d be no actors. Perhaps you didn’t question the $ 5 admission. You have been warned.
Now, IMHO the vertigo tunnel was worth the price of admission. Certainly I’d pay $ 5 for the spinning experience. But it’s not for everyone – my aunt closed her eyes. Thus her $ 20 was wasted (she bought four tickets – thank you!).
If not for the vertigo tunnel, zero stars.
Because of the tunnel, one star.
The outside is interesting, but you don’t have to pay to see the outside.
Last, the three workers (ticket sales, photography and printing) were courteous and professional, and the building itself was clean.

I’m only giving it 1 star because I can’t give it 0. We thought, «hey, it’s only $ 5.00. Let’s check it out.» Wow were we wrong! It took less than 10 minutes to walk through with no Plot or story. It wasn’t even well decorated. They clearly spent all their money on the outside, which is pretty cool. Bottom line — save your $ 5. It’s not even worth that!

Read the reviews on Unilocal and figured what the heck, it’s only $ 5. Went in with low/​no expectations because of the reviews and still found it to be a waste of time. There was no rhyme or reason to the attraction and not a single thing that was exciting. Save your time and skip this one…

Biggest waste of money. It Should have been a clue when the packing lot was empty…

If no stars was on option this place would get it. Like a sucker I paid a whole 5 $ to walk this pointless attraction! Then at the end of this pathetic «highly classified experience» they try sell me a 20 $ photo! Ha! Get $&@?

Okay, we HAD to do this. After seeing an inverted White House time and time again… c’mon. It was only $ 5 a person! There is a T-​Rex coming out of it!
Yes, it is a tourist trap, but it was a weird and fun time with my family. There is not a ton to see, but the layout is enough to keep you entertained on your walk. Lol.
And I still cannot figure out if the construction was park of the schtick or if it were real… THERE is the Top Secret.
Plus, my kiddo was throwing a world-​class tantrum before arriving. After a walk through the weirdness of Top Secret and his being shocked into a karmic bite of silence, I cannot think of a better way to have spent $ 15.

This sucked, glad it was only $ 5. Didn’t understand the purpose nor concept. It would be a cool place for a haunted house

Waste of time and effort walking through hodgepodge nonsense. As I am leaving I am wondering what the point of this was and how they are even still in business. Comon’ really. It’s top secret because if everyone knew how lame this was they’d been shut down long ago

Horrible! We went in the end of off-​season and none of the automatronics were working. There were safety lights out and it was dark. At the end of it they tried to sell us our picture. Just take your pictures from the outside

The outside of Top Secret is impressive. Stop, take a photo and then leave. Going inside is truly a waste of time and money, even for $ 5. We ignored the poor reviews and thought we would check it out anyway. Big mistake. You walk through a poorly designed layout of upside down rooms and a few scare tactics. If you have young children who scare easily it may scare them but probably be more annoying than anything.

We had a blast. The price was great. Great fun and pictures. All ages went as young as 3 yrs old. Will go again!

Not sure why this place has such a low rating, I think peoples expectations are too grand. The outside of this place is pretty impressive and that probably contributes to this fact. If you go in with low expectations, and just want to explore it for what it is I think you can enjoy yourself!
I am not sorry I went! This place is a kitschy roadside attraction and if you define it that way it will serve you well.

PLEASE! Do not waste your money. 5.00 is too much.
I just read a post that mentioned a tour guide, maybe that would enhance the moment.
We had no tour guide, we (family of 5: 10,13,15) walked through this rip off place in 2 minutes. Complete waste of time.
I read a few reviews before we went and still decided to see it for ourselves, do not do it. Take a few pics outside and call it a day.
Do not waste your time and money. Go buy some ice cream instead.

Take a picture out front and save your money
I had to laugh out loud when I saw how low Top Secret’s rating is. It’s still too high. I used to work in the Dells a couple of years ago; universally, I never heard anyone say anything good about this place. Reactions, whether from friends or customers of the hotel I worked at making small talk, ranged from befuddlement to anger over having been bilked for whatever the normal entry fee is. Locals know this place is a joke.
I ended up getting in for a discount when I worked in the Dells (fringe benefits!). Having been coached on what to expect, I was really expecting a «so bad it’s good» experience. Nope, it’s just bad.
Others have explained more-​or-​less what the experience is like, so I won’t go into that in much detail. Basically, you walk through a house and see an «alien.» It’s really just a mish-​mash of different conspiriacy-​esque props. I’m pretty sure this place was conceived by the same mind responsible for «Birdemic: Shock and Terror.»
If you’re dead set on going, try to find coupons. I’m sure they’re out there somewhere and hopefully they’ll dull your inevitable sense of disappointment. Otherwise, take it from a (former) local: there’s better things for a tourist to do in the Dells.

What? Like, what the hell did I pay $ 5 for? I literally walked into an old, decrepit house with furniture nailed to the ceilings, and at the very end *SPOILER* I saw one alien.
The alien had a terrible latex mask on its mannequin stuffed body. It was too dark, and the entire place smelled like an old lady on a hot summer afternoon.
I feel worse for the employees who print off «novelties» as I call them for you after your «tour.»
You get a fantastic key chain, some wallet photos, and even a nice 8×10 to put in a Wisconsin Dells picture frame of your choice (sold at your local frugal shop on the city’s strip).
Be warned my fellow thespians, the only thing top secret about this place is why it’s still open.

I was on a fall trip here and the price was right: $ 5 per person
TOP SECRET lacks a narrative without a tour guide (must be an on-​season only thing) but has a couple of fun-​house favorites. There was one really dark turn that scared the crap out of me.
If you go in with low expectations, it’s cheesy and cute.