I’d never really thought of going to Subway before, but there was a coupon for a half-price breakfast roll and coffee in the local paper so I called in on my way to the office. According to the ad, the choice was bacon, egg, sausage etc. but the restaurant was offering … turkey rashers. Great if you like turkey, but as I can’t stand the stuff, it was a choice of cheese or cheese. I had thought of explaining that bacon is supposed to be made of pork, but it gradually dawned on me that this must be one of the famous Subway Halal restaurants, in which case they would have been really insulted at my being so insensitive. I can understand their religious objections, but in their position, I think I’d have gone in for a different restaurant franchise. There’s no getting away from the fact that, in Britain, breakfast from a restaurant is all about bacon — real bacon, that is. If I’d wanted dried up turkey in a stale roll, I could have brought that in from home.