Dick’s Last Resort

The server was great although there was zero sarcasm the steamed shrimp was amazing definitely a must

Dicks was a great time. Our server Christine kept us entertained and the food was on point!

Eh, stopped in just to have a drink on the water. Had no idea about the sarcasm and really, didn’t even get any real good sarcasm directed at me. The first drink was very tasty. Enjoyed the mountain of BBQ nachos, very tasty as well. We ordered a second round and those drinks sucked. Once I got the bill I wanted to throw up my nachos. 14.00 for a daiquiri and two of them tasted like rotten swill. We were yelled at for not tanking our cups with us but really the $ 2.00 plastic cup that was not even rinsed for us isnt my thing. Oh well, enjoyed the nachos and watching the customers with the stupid hats they make up. If your bored, check it out. Just dont expect too much.

This place absolutely blows. Drinks are weak, never heard an ounce of sarcasm or humor from the server and the bartender told us she was knew and was «currently learning sarcasm»… and the food was ridiculously overpriced. This place won’t last.

HORRIBLE!!! DO NOT GO HERE!!! One star is way too much for this place. I wish I could give negative stars!
Unless you have a mental deficiency or a psychological defect that gives you a compelling desire to wait hours for disgusting food and weak drinks served in plastic Dixie cups that are insanely overpriced, served by ABUSIVE, ignorant, mental midgets who would otherwise be fortunate to work cleaning out the toilets of port-a-potty’s…which would still likely prove to be a test of their insufficient mental capabilities and sheer laziness.
I have no problems with humor or sarcasm. However, true sarcasm requires sharp wit, intellect and comedic timing… and not one of these servers could likely count to ten unless they used their fingers or toes. In addition, there should be some sort of warning or disclaimer at the entrance, so patrons are somewhat aware of what is coming before it is too late.
I had never heard of Dick’s Last Resort… but I now understand why all surrounding restaurants had an hour wait and Dick’s was empty… because NOBODY would return to this place unless they were intoxicated to the point of blindness, or like us, miserably unaware that a place like this could exist in such a high rent district. (Baltimore’s Inner Harbor)
So now to the details that I would like to forget… We chose this place because my 4 children, aged 7 – 12 were starving and all surrounding restaurants had long lines. Our foul-​mouthed server took 20 minutes to address us. She literally threw the menus at us and began her «speech» about how «She doesn’t like or do kids». My children were horrified but had no idea of what was to come. I interrupted as she droned on about how «We do not do French fries and most little brats like fries… so if we wanted fries, we should leave.» Oh… how I wish we did!!!
When my son ordered a virgin Pina Colada with a slice of pineapple, she asked him what planet he was from and told him to wake up… if he wanted pineapple, he should go to Hawaii. My husband ordered a Sam Adams beer that ended up costing $ 20 with the plastic cup it came in that he never asked for. I ordered a cadillac margarita. She had no idea what this was. So I ordered a Margarita made with Patron and Grand Marnier with salt on the rocks. She brought me an 8oz. plastic Dixie cup filled with a lime and sour mix and 3 side cups of Patron, Grand Marnier, and rock salt. So I got to mix my own $ 28 margarita… not kidding!!!
My daughter ordered a Diet Coke, and received a 10
Minute lecture on the evils of diet soda (my kids never drink soda unless we are on vacation) She told my daughter that the soda would rot her brain and kill her and then moved on to me… telling me that I needed parenting classes and that I was a horrible mother. At this point I saw the look of horror on my kid’s faces. My 7 year old was on the verge of tears and the others were in a state of shock. They have been going to restaurants from McDonalds to Nobu to The Four Seasons since they were babies and have never been treated so rudely.
So enough was enough… I stood up to leave because I teach my children to have self-​respect and boundaries and I felt I needed to exercise mine. Once I was on my feet, the disrespectful wench backed off and apologized and promised to cease and desist. My husband begged me to stay because everyone was starving. My kids wanted to leave. I advised the dread-​locked server (I wish I could remember her name instead of her hideous face) to bring us our food and the check and to stay away from us. I also requested a Diet Coke!!!
The food took forever, was cold, greasy and nearly inedible. We ordered 3 different baskets of chicken wings at $ 8.99 each, a cheeseburger at $ 9.95 and a kids hotdog for $ 5.99. Our server steered clear of our table but mocked us to the 5 other customers that were in the facility and pointed at us laughing! Nice! Our bill was $ 109.45!!! We paid and got the flock out of there. I waved goodbye to our wonderful server using only one finger. So let me end by saying…
From this day forward… If Dick’s was my Last Resort… I would starve to death!
Let me repeat… DO NOT GO HERE!!! Please!

I’m giving a star because the service was fast but the food and the concept was horrible. I ordered the chicken and ribs combo, I had to send the food back because they gave me 3 bones with fat on two and overlooked cold flesh on the 3^rd. We initially wanted to sit at the «dock» which is on the water but that section they only offered their overpriced drinks in plastic cups and also had no cold mugs for beer and they charged $ 6 for a 12 ounce beer. Needless to say I sent the food back and when it came back the ribs were cold. This was the worst restaurant I’ve ever been to! Do yourself a favor and don’t waste your time with this one.

We went here last Thursday after my wife took here exam. We sat at the bar and has a huge margarita and a large Guinness, while waiting for the surprise family to arrive service was fast but like everyone else says they are a little pricey. So they arrived and we sat at a table. Our server was kinda funny he made hats for several tables and sang aloud a bit off key he even danced though we told him he should keep his day job. Food was average I put his photo on Facebook and got a fresh cookie free of charge. We all had a pretty darn good time. Paid the check and like the bar a bit pricey but totally worth it for the awesome service.

We sat on the patio where our waitress used the excuse of bad service to rarely show up at our table. We should of checked the Unilocal ratings before coming here. Here’s why you should not go.
1) our 3 year old was hurt when a street performer landed on him when he attempted to do a somersault off the stairs. The street rat slinked away before I could yell at him or consider pressing charges. Smart street rat. Management did nothing but made attempt to say the street rat would be discouraged to perform on their property.
2) wait staff and management don’t know or care about gluten allergies. Our waitress did not know what was ok to eat and said she’d check with the chef and never came back. The manager came back out after we complained and did not know what gluten allergies are.
3) when we finally got our meal (shrimp cocktail, chix fingers and salmon) we had no silverware. The guy who brought out our food said he didn’t have time to bring us silverware. I went inside to grab some .
4) we asked for our check and once it came, no one came back so I went back in.
Now, I get Dicks is supposed to be sarcastic but you still need to perform at a level of basic customer service. There’s just no excuse. Don’t waste your money on zero customer service and on top of this bad food. I didn’t even have a chance to yak about the food. Even if the food was great though the level of attention was so bad, the food would suck.

I’m really not sure why we decided to give this place a try. We were out in the harbor and didn’t want to wait — the group I was with was not in a state to be picky. We just wanted some comfort/​bar food and drinks… we understood pretty quickly that the wait staff was going to be rude… and we were okay with that. But to be frank, the food was really bad… the «bucket of fries» was more like a small plate. For a meal, I got a sample BBQ platter with four items and only one of the items was even palatable… my guests got grilled chicken salads and they were pathetic. The bathroom smelled worse than any dive bar bathroom I’ve ever been in, the drinks were overpriced ($ 30 for a rum punch gravity fed by a corona) and the whole thing was just not worth the «experience» of being insulted for a laugh.

The motto of the bar is to be rude to the customer’s, we’ll they are in a funny way. It was great. A big party atmosphere. The food was delicious, no complaints. Not really a kid friendly atmosphere since the white hats said lewd phases… I wouldn’t bring my kids.
It’s a good place for fun!

Do not come here! Send your enemies here!
If there was an option for zero stars, actually more aptly negative stars, this place would get it. If you’re looking for a way to ruin your afternoon, come here.
Although the waitstaff are supposedly «sarcastic» and confident in their «attitude» (as some of the reviewers have mentioned), that does not give them to excuse to be racist. My sisters and I (asian in our ethnicity) were so horrified by some of the remarks we left almost immediately after being seated. ..

I guess you have to be a or be around a D*ck regularly to understand this place. Stopped in for lunch with my family and had a good time. If you’re uptight or can’t match wits with an ass, spend your money elsewhere.

We were visiting from NY, and have never heard of Dick’s Last Resort. But since BubbaGumps, Phillips, and HardRock all had a 45 min wait, we decided to go to Dick’s as a «last resort».
When we first walked in, the hostess was nice and said it’ll only take a few minutes and just wait at the entrance by the bar.
As soon as we sat down, we noticed people wearing tall white hats. (Okay, I thought, they offer hats if you ask for them with things written on)
Then we sensed something was off… the servers were obnoxious and rude, and turns out they were jokes written on the hats, and they were not requested by the patrons. Okay fine I get it. You make fun of people. But it crossed the line when me and my BF’s hat both had a RACIST joke (we’re Asian). Let’s face it, Baltimore is a city w/​diversity; I don’t see other hats with racist jokes on them nor the mentioning of race. After we took our hats off and just concentrated on finished our food so we can get the F out of there, the server continued to show other patrons near us the the hats he made, and at one point a few people around us were pointing and laughing… Do people really PAY MONEY for this??? We inhaled our food and left. Not only til after we left, I realized that our Bulldogs (margarita with upside down beer) was $ 30 each.
I think for people who are looking to be humiliated and throwing rude jokes back and forth it’s a fun time. But for tourists who don’t know, DO NOT RUIN YOUR VACATION WITH THIS PLACE.

I came here to do a Paint Nite and I was very unimpressed with the drinks and fried pickles. I got the Trashcan Punch and it tasted like juice, barely any alcohol. They were overpriced for what you got. The fried pickles were breaded and not really hot. The consistency was unappealing. The only redeeming quality was the service.

This place is the worst. I can take the rudeness of the wait staff but at least make it funny. It was horrible. Plus we were told not to order entrees as we would not get our food in time. We had 2 hours. Still told us we didn’t have time and that we should just stick with appetizers. One of the worst places I have ever been to.

My boyfriend and I went here last week after leaving the aquarium. We had a really fun time. I wish I would of caught the bartenders name because she was absolutely hilarious. This is not a place I would go with grandma and grandpa for a nice sit down quiet meal, but it is definitely a place to go to cut up and laugh and have great drinks and appetizers at. We loved it and are still laughing over our insult hats that we got while we were there.

truly a last resort and even then don’t go here…
I try to take my daughter in here on new yrs day 2016 and I’m not allowed to come in because im carrying a half cup of hot chocolate
for my daughter. We walked several blocks to get there and it’s cold outside so we stopped at 711 prior to reaching Dicks. And we’re told that we have to give the cup of hot chocolate to the greeter at the front or else we can’t come in to get a table. The manager, a short gray haired 50 ish idiot upheld this foolishness stating that it’s against the law to allow us in the restaurant with our cup of hot cocoa… I asked him if I should find another restaurant who would take my money and he said to me that no other restaurant would let us in with a cup of cocoa in hand… I shook my head, grabbed my daughter by the hand and promptly left… after reminding him of why they are in business in the first place and asking him if there is a state law against them selling terrible food, most of which is probably not fit for human consumption… We went over to Pei Wei and had no trouble at all but I can’t help wonder if the staff at Dicks last resort are all idiots or if it’s just limited to the goofballs that I encountered. zero stars!

Don’t come to this place unless you want your day to be ruin. ***
This place needs to learn better business practices. When your customers are coming in, they should be consented that this place is service with sarcasm.
We came into this place because we saw the promotion menu outside. The bbq pulled pork nachos sounded super delicious, so we went to get a table. NOTE: watch out for the older cherry blonde waitress (she is SUPER RUDE). The waitress came over to ask if we were waiting for someone else (as one of our party members got up and left to use the bathroom). We responded, «no» (obviously because the waitress saw the third party member leave the table. For some reason, she decided to be rude about it. she asked, if there was another party member we were waiting for. We responded no because she saw our friend get up and leave. The waitress then began to mock/​insult us. She began to talk to us like we were children (the baby voices) and counted how many people were sitting down. She then mouthed and exaggerated her «wow» in disbelief that we wouldn’t count or something? We were shocked at what happened and just stared at her. She left our table. We started to gather our things because we decided we were not going to sit through an hour long meal, being insulted by this server. While we were waiting for the last member of our party to return from the bathroom, the waitress came over. She explained that dicks is really a fun place to eat at and we had to try it. She mentioned that this place is sarcasm with service. In the business industry, if your customers are offended by your remarks — you apologize. Of course she didn’t say that. we waited for the last member of our party to return and then left.

Let’s just get the obvious out of the way: Patrons come here first for the attitudes of the waitstaff, then the food. If you come to Dick’s for a classy sit down meal, you are at the wrong place entirely. (Go to the near by Hard Rock for that.)
The waitstaff are masters of their craft… sarcasm and attitude. The waitstaff are not by any means shy. Soon after you are seated, your waitress fits you with a giant white paper hat (a condom hat) with some obnoxious saying written in Sharpie on it. During my most recent visit, my condom hat had a face hole cut out with the words «Glory Hole» written on it. Our waitress also took it upon herself to write «Butt Juice» and «Urinal Water» on my and friend’s beverage glasses… which we found quite amusing. We also had piles… and I do mean piles… of napkins thrown at us… multiple times. Which I also found really funny.
The thing about Dick’s is, don’t be afraid to throw comments back to the waitstaff, but also be prepared to get really heckled back. Like I said, the employees there are masters at it.
The food… well… is ok. It’s nothing to brag about. They don’t have a huge selection of food. Burgers, chicken… usual American dining food. It’s a little pricey, but that’s almost to be expected in the Inner Harbor.
If you like a quiet sit down meal with attentive and kind waitstaff… THIS IS NOT THE PLACE FOR YOU!!! However, if you’re like me and enjoy the obnoxious every now and again and have a sense of humor, give Dick’s a try. You won’t leave without cracking a smile, I promise.

This is my first time eating at this restaurant. Apparently this a sarcasm promoting restaurant? I don’t know. But for me the host/​waiter was really rude and not helpful at all. I was undecided between two of the lunch specials. When I asked him what he would recommend, he just told me: «I don’t know. Whatever you want.» Thank you dude! Really helpful!
Anyways, I ended up eating the big pig, which is a pulled pork BBQ sandwich. It wasn’t that good and the sauce was spicy.
At least the prices were affordable and the place seemed nice for hanging out after a long day at work.

My birth certificate may be an apology from the condom factory, but I don’t want people to know it!
If you like being insulted by servers, and eating nasty food, then this is the place for you!

Loved it! The waiter was so funny and the food was good! The hats that they make are hysterical! The music was fun and upbeat! The prices were a bit higher than most place but it was fun! I recommend it as an experience to have for sure!

What you’d expect from an overtly party-​themed bar, only even louder and younger. Like, a LOT louder. Part of the shtick seems to be the bartenders hollering at each other across the space. Lots of big parties doing themed shots and drinks here, so if you’re into that, this might be the place for you. But mind your wallet, this is the most expensive bar I’ve been in close to all year, and I go to bars regularly. Shots of Jack were $ 10 each, who ever heard of such a thing?!
Definitely give this one a miss.

Could not give three stars… It is obviously set up for tourists. T shirts are hawked, and a drink that cost 17.00 that comes with a 2.00 mug speaks volumes. YES I get they are «dicks» on purpose… but at least be clever. The hats your sarcastic waiter makes for you are cute. Our waiter was new, and he really needs to brush up on his sarcasm. The sarcasm I observed with other tables was bordering on just being insulting.
Sarcasm is an art. One waiter made a comment to a young kid of 9, that was not cool. Ribs were ok…
A plus… its RIGHT on the Inner Harbor…

I forgot my wallet here, which is my fault. But I called them up 10 mins after I left, and the guy who answered was pretty sure there was no wallet around. I wanted to make sure for myself so I stopped by again within the next 10 mins. Again they were pretty certain they didn’t find any wallet. I asked him if any of the waiters left after their shift, maybe the ones who left put it some place safe, the guy was certain no one left. So I asked him for my waiter, and he then told me that he had left. Then, a waitress walks my to my friend and «recommends» checking in the restroom. And sure enough it was there, 60 dollars missing.
Forgetting the wallet was my fault no doubt. But as an establishment that services people, lying to a customer is pretty bad.
Me nor any of my friends will ever go to this place again.

We reserved a table for 9 and my wife and I were the first to arrive on a very cold evening. We sat at the bar and dealt with a bar tender who must have been a car salesman during the day. I wanted an Irish coffee to warm up. After turning down the repetitive insistence that a shot would be better and comments about the coffee being terrible. I finally received my drink which was a styrofoam cup of coffee with Bailey’s irish cream. Could barely taste the Baileys and was charged $ 10 for it ?? Another guest showed up and had the ‘trashcan punch’. After being harassed several times by the bar tender to get the $ 0.75 shot of «151 rum» on top, I said just put it in a shot glass and I’ll drink it. To call it an ¹⁄₈ of a shot would be generous. Now I understand why it was so inexpensive but no way anyone drinking it in a mixed drink would have known it was there.
On to dinner … waitress was trying to live up to the reputation of Dick’s by being rude but just came across as arrogant server and was not funny by any means. We have been to the Myrtle Beach location and it was jovial and fun for all … NOT HERE.
The menu consists of items all priced just South of $ 20. When food arrived, the bbq sauce more closely resembled warm ketchup with a hint of spice, coleslaw was rancid, and chicken was extremely dry and uneatable. The only items that had some taste were the appetizer mozzarella sticks, chicken wings, and the ribs.
My family of 4 ended up with a total bill of $ 140. Soooooo many other great places to spend $ 140 for dinner with Little Italy right around the corner.
We will not return and I hope this review helps others not waste their money.

A buddy of mine was visiting from Detroit and staying at a nearby hotel. I thought it would be a hoot to finally try Dick’s, and I told him the premise of the restaurant and we were excited to go! We were able to sit at the bar where the bartender was cool, not nearly as sarcastic as we expected, but whatever. We ordered drinks, that didn’t have prices, but hey it’s Dick’s so the prices cant be that expensive. So when the bartender disappears around the corner and comes back with the drinks, I knew then that there was some type of premade drink mix involved. The drinks literally tasted like watered down Kool-​Aid, which would not be a huge issue if we weren’t trying to get have a drinks and get a nice buzz going.
We both ordered the shrimp and steak platter, MEDIOCRE! I waited to eat all day for that meal and ended up disappointed and STILL HUNGRY. The portion size was not for a full grown man or a growing 5^th grader for that matter. My friend did not finish his food, however, I did because I was extremely hungry. We were so disappointed and at that point ready to go! SO, here is the juicy part… The bill was $ 97.00…Yup that drink that didn’t have the price listed was $ 30.00 :-/​. Not only did we spend $ 100 on a meal and drinks that we didn’t enjoy, we were right down the street from ‘The Cheesecake Factory’ and would have been totally satisfied there… but I wanted to show my friend a good time in the City…
Overall, bad food and soft watered down drinks… NEVER AGAIN!

The food pretty much matches the service you’ll receive. I was fine going for the experience of being treated like crap. But overpriced, bad tasting food too? Definitely not going back.
IF YOU’RE VISITING BALTIMORE, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GO SOMEWHERE ELSE!

Well if the service was any better, I would have poured my own drinks and cooked my own food. And the host was about as helpful as a wet napkin.
Not sure we’ll visit here again, too many other choices.

!!! THEY ARE RUDE TO YOU ON PURPOSE. THIS IS THE POINT OF THIS RESTAURANTS. THEY ARE DICKS AND ITS FUNNY. DONT COME IF YOU ARENT IN THAT MINDSET !!!
That being said… this place is hilarious. Been here twice, since I live 30 minutes outside of Baltimore. My friends and i have come and we have joked back with the waiters… we expect them to be jokingly rude and toss napkins at us and demand to know what we want to eat (and make fun of our order). If you can’t handle the jokes and humor, DONT COME HERE. They write crude jokes on paper hats. ITS THE THEME OF THE PLACE. Some of you people reviewing this place need to open your eyes.
Highly recommend the drinks and the shrimp or pulled pork.
Clearly not a family restaurant. Come with friends and drink.

This place reminds me a lot of Ed Debevic’s in Chicago. Salty waitstaff and pretty darn good food were the highlights of our recent visit. The hats (and associated labels) were 2 for 3 — the one proclaiming that a 2^nd grade boy was born a girl was just not appropriate. I know that dry humor comes with the turf and is expected but said humor doesn’t have to be hurtful. Something to keep in mind…
Good overall experience — loved the bra décor :)

We knew what we were getting into and still had a horrible time. I wish you could give this place a negative rating.
Ate here at the request of a friend in our group as he’d heard about the reputation and sass the waiters had so we thought we’d be in for some smart ass comments and mockery in good fun. We were sorely mistaken. Waiter throws straws and napkins at you, yells at you like you’re a child and will mock every choice you make when you try and order. Worst part is they can’t take the sarcasm you throw back at them. Ordered an appetizer and water cause that’s all I was in the mood for after looking over their menu. When our waiter forgot my glass of water I shot a remark at him asking how I was supposed to choke down their horrible food without something to drink. He then preceded to «forget» I asked for water and never brought it.
The service wasn’t much better after that so we got our check and left never to return.

I literally have no idea how this place is in business. The service is terrible (which I get, is the point), the food isn’t good… we only went there because they were the only place with no wait. Obviously, now I know why!

Hmm, where to start? I guess I’ll just start by saying this place was disgusting. Totally and utterly disgusting. We got the first clue when we walked in the door and were greeted by a horrible fishy smell. Second clue, trash all over the floors. Third, a rather gruff bartender who barely said two words to us. Then, I made the mistake of going to the bathroom. Nope — no class there either. Not at all. My husband and I guzzled, and I mean, guzzled, our beers and got out of there quick. It was the most horrible ten minute experience I’ve ever had in a «restaurant.» You couldn’t pay me to eat there.
I suggest taking the name of it literally — Dick’s «LAST RESORT». Actually, just don’t ever resort to going to this place. I know I won’t ever again. This place is a chain, and after looking at some of the reviews for their other locations, it’s amazing they’re still in business.
Anyway, I recommend going to the Hard Rock Café next door — it is WAY nicer!