Lorraine’s Diner

At the end of the night when your wallet is light from the good times at the bar, you’re gonna need something greasy to eat. This is the place. Don’t go there sober, you will not enjoy. Go there after six or seven beers with a hunger. You’ll get what you need with a side of a wise crackin waitress who seems like she’d be at home in a truck stop in 1950. I think i remember eating their homemade meatloaf and cheese fries. Food is alright, the ambiance and enviornment are classic. Lorraines, my favorite drunk time machine. Btw, you might smell weird after you eat here. Don’t forget to be drunk!

I love places like this. Like seriously love them. I love gross, greasy diner food. Although I was disappointed in my waitress (she could have been bitchier, like the marquee promises) she served up a damn good grilled cheese and kept this drunk girl’s water full. Plus, I saw an tumblweed (WTF??? I know right?) on the street in downtown Chicago on the way there which was completely inexplicable and also real because I took a picture of it to remind myself in the morning so that is frickin memorable.

My best friend lives across the street, and whenever I visit her I eat here.
I eat here mostly because it’s open 24 hrs, and I’m wasted, but I’ve never had anything that wasn’t good.
The food, setting, and service is equivalent to a Waffle House.
So many fuzzy drunken memories of meals at Lorraine’s.

The suggestion of going to Lorraine’s can only be taken seriously if one is either A) looking to conduct scientific studies on the effects of bacteria buildup on dining surfaces or B) drunk out of their skull. I’m going to assume the majority of you would be going there for the latter reason (but suggest someone of the former persuasion take a trip there because I’m convinced groundbreaking discoveries could be made.)
I’ve been to Lorraine’s a few times. Every time I’ve had the same waitress. She’s so nice, she really is. I’m sure she didn’t mean to make it nearly impossible for me to eat by talking about the bedbugs that were currently residing in her home.
I have to give it two stars for its comedic value.
Oh, Lorraine’s…

I’m gonna give it three stars because it’s open 24 hours. That’s worth A LOT. You want pcakes at four in the am, done. You want some late bacon, done.
That being said, 24 hours is a real benefit to being an eatery, but overall I gotta give it the thumbs down. I’ve eaten here a few times, as in enough to judge it, and for the most part, it just plain sucks. I hate to say it. I like this place. I like the staff and like the location, but the food does not deliver.
I once ordered the meat loaf and it was damn near inedible. I love meatloaf, I was crushed, but to this day I still think about how not good that loaf of meat was. The green beans were tasteless. Look, I like cafeteria food, but this didn’t cut it. It was, just, not any good.
BUT…if you’re hungry at 3AM, go there and lap it up. You’ll probably think it’s the best food ever, slathered in butter, and better than the Subway across the street. So, for a 24 hour joint, it’s got a few points.

I haven’t been to Loraine’s in quite some time but there is nothing like a fried egg sandwich with tomatoes & mayo at 3 in the morning to settle a drunk tummy and they make a mean fried egg sandwich.
Great for what it is, don’t get fancy and expect anything more.

I can respect a good diner and even though I’m not a diner fanatic, I enjoy them for consistencies sake… they deliver on somewhat of a «chain» level so there’s an element of predictability with their offerings… and even though the majority of them are mom and pop’s, they still manage to put out nearly identical fare, both in taste and menu options.
So i came here specifically for the biscuits and gravy. In short, dire. Really, completely and utterly bad, both from the gravy and the biscuits themselves. Thank god I only got a ½ order. Also had the #1 which was a pancake, link, bacon and an egg. Pedestrian at 2.5÷5.
This meal was a fail for the most part and the B&G’s may have been the worst i’ve ever had.

Ok… It’s not Charlie Trotter’s … Let’s all deal with it.
The food isn’t all that bad… limited but not bad… especially at 4am… At least here, you’ll get a full meal, you can sit down and you leave realizing that your level of hunger led you to enter Lorraine’s in the first place.
It sure beats McDonald’s across the street at 4am where the drive up is slow as molasses in January, expensive for what it is and who wants McDonald’s flimsy breakfast food when at Lorraine’s for less you can have a full breakfast and get waited on.
Let’s also give a round of applause to waitress Colleen,
(the fake Lorraine)…
…“She works so hard for the money”… Donna Summer 2:1−2

Yea, it’s small and a little dirty but the food is tasty and they make it right in front of your face so you don’t have to question it.
Contrary to the sign, the waitress was pleasant… friendly, in fact.
Our waitress, colleen, kept us company during our stay at Lorraine’s. Her cousin/​brother/​friend was chillin at a table in the corner by himself feasting on vanilla wafers and a glass of milk as she told us her whole life story and about her love for «that little gay guy» on Will and Grace.
2 pancakes, 2 sausage patties, one egg over easy: about $ 6.
For water she gave us a big red pitcher full of unfiltered tap water and a stack of plastic cups, no ice.
You really shouldn’t be eating here unless it’s after 2am and you’re wasted.
Crappy, with no apologies, and that’s OK with me!

I’m ashamed to say that yes, after a very long Halloween night, some friends and I decided Lorraine’s would be a good idea. Oh, how wrong we were!!!
I drive past Lorraines everyday and still smell the grease and smoke… their claim to fame is that their waitresses are «bitchy» and fyi, they are not!
If you are looking for a greasy spoon and close by, just head to Hollywood Grill, bypass Lorraines as you will hate yourself in the morning! Grilled cheese was acceptable, friendly server but the atmosphere is dirty, grimy and smelly!!! Overall — disgusting!

I always get a double cheeseburger w/​pommes frite when I come here. The «frite?» Awesome for some reason. The burger too, but I’ve had greasier — better. Still, I come.
The lady who works there when I visit… IS ALWAYS THERE. I don’t think there’s ever anyone else there but her and the cook. It’s hilarious — she comes out of the back room somewhere when the bells on the door jingle, takes your order and walks into that back room again. Out comes the cook, he makes my hamburger and super fries, bags it up then goes in that back room again. She comes out, says, «Five Sixty, hun,» takes my money and says bye. Then walks into that back room again!
They must be watching VH1’s The Pick Up Artist or something. Good show, I get it.
Anyways, I’ve never had anything else but a cheeseburger and fries, but its greasy and memorable enough for me to write a review about. Plus the lady is nice. I like her.

My lasting impression of this place is that it belongs in a middle-​of-​nowhere Southern town, not at the intersection of Chicago and Damen. If Lorraine’s were in a middle-​of-​nowhere Southern town, I would imagine it as the only place to go when your car breaks down on a dark dirt road. Similarly, on the intersection of Chicago and Damen, it is the only place to go when you find yourself wandering the lonely streets for whatever reason at 2 am. Either way, Lorraine’s holds its place as a comforting and reliable corner diner, with friendly (and not the least bit bitchy) waitresses, flourescent glow and overpowering smell of fried eggs and bacon. I’m not sure where the sass about bitchiness and dirty dishes comes in.
They messed up our order two or three times, but were able to bring over the right items within seconds, as well as let us keep the mess-​ups. Menu platters probably average $ 3 – 6; bill was $ 22 for six full-​stomached people.
A giant plate of hash browns, scrambled eggs and toast for about three bucks is pretty great. Most things come slathered in butter, and you’ll leave smelling like a grease bucket. Well, that’s the way to do it, isn’t it?

Wretched. I’ve only eaten here once though it’s fairly close to my house. The place advertises that they serve good on dirty dishes. They do. I ordered the vegetarian omelette and midway through, I found a lump of something from the grill … most likely from a few hours prior. I’m pretty sure it was burnt meat.
My gal pal had gotten a salad and the lettuce had brown tinges to it.
We did not have a waiter per se, rather ordered at the food bar area and also retrieved our food from there once it was cooked. That wasn’t too bothersome. Is this typical?
Cheap, but not that tasty!

I will be coming back here. Again and again. Omelettes are awesome and tasty and piping hot. I only sit at the counter to keep an eye on how my food is made.
I love this diner! I realized — it’s a diner. Not Green Zebra. After realizing that, Lorraine’s has been looking better and better. And I eat here at least once a month. For breakfast. Sober. I don’t know why.

At 4am there was nowhere else to go. Lorraine’s called our drunken names. Post party the fella’s and i dragged our bloated bellies to Lorraine’s. 4 stars because this place reminded me of the all trashy diners i’d call home back in virginia. And 4 stars for Lorraine she’s a sharp shooter–
Coffee is diner coffee. Gotta have the corned beef hash with an egg and homefries. Bacon too, for dessert. Come for the ambience, the greasy food or Lorraine. I’d say prices a bit high, but she’s gotta make a livin’ and most hipsterfied kids are gonna pay (they say alcohol impairs judgement).
I’m coming back, post booze blast.

Have you ever wanted to live in a David Lynch movie? Just put on your sharpest red suit and head over to Lorraine’s.
Unlike some of the other reviewers, I’d say I’ve never really been totally disgusted here. Perhaps «pleasantly disgusted» is more appropriate. The odd mix of dilapidated country diner with festive holiday decorations year-​round, vaguely threatening hand-​written signs, and the ever-​present dude-​asleep-​at-​counter, combined with the view outside of strollers and heels kind of makes you feel like you’re in a gingham-​curtained fishbowl in Hell.
In a good way.
With pancakes.

Why so many stars for a corner diner?
To counter-​act all of the whiny «oh, it’s dirty! the ladies are bitches!» reviews.
Get a grip, people. IT’S A DINER. Take your foodie ass over to Hollywood Grill and pay ten damn dollars for an overpriced dish of eggs if you hate it so much.
Why I love Lorianne’s:
–Location.
–24 hour-​ness.
–Oldies on the radio.
–Place to sit at the counter.
–While the sign reads something about «bitchy waitresses» I have yet to experience it — EVEN when I’ve stumbled in here with loud, drunk friends, they’ve still managed to chuckle at us and not hate us.
–Chocolate chip pancakes with cheese fries (no I don’t smoke pot… but chocolate and cheese next to each other is better than peanut butter and jelly).
My drinking-​till-​7AM days are over (I think) but I’ll always remember coming here with my friend, who ordered a steak (yeah, at sun-​up) «bloody as hell… still moo-​ing.» The waitress lady thought that was hilarious.

Lorraine’s should be commended for being disgusting in such an all-​encompassing way. Eating at this place is an experience that you will never EVER forget.
After a night of heavy drinking, my brother and I decided to stop by for breakfast the next morning. Despite a sign proclaiming ‘bitchy waitresses,’ there was one grizzled man who may or may not speak English working all positions.
He barely mumbled at us. I noticed that they actually offer a choice of coffee or Sanka on the menu. This is relevant as it lets you know something of the mentality of the regular patrons of Lorraine’s — some of them would willingly drink instant reconstituted coffee when real coffee is an option.
We both ordered omelets. The man grunted and walked back behind the counter. A few minutes later he gave us styrofoam cups filled with coffee and our toast, which he actually held onto the plates with his bare hands. The toast was two slices of Wonderbread glued together with approximately ¾ of a cup of heart-​stopping margarine.
I don’t even know how to explain the omelets. My brother described his like this: «I could have taken the human hair that I found in mine and run it underneath the entire omelet through the river of grease it was sitting in.»
Yes. That’s right. A long, black hair. The one man working there did not have long black hair. Despite the fact that our eggs were filled with non-​greasy Velveeta knockoff ‘cheese’, these were the slimiest, greasiest things I’ve eaten in my life. The whole situation was so surreal that we couldn’t help but laugh.
The vegetables were flavorless and soggy. We assumed that someone BOILED them a week prior and refrigerated them until they needed to be used. Maybe even froze them at some point. I have never seen green peppers look so translucent, withered and sad in my life.
So if you want to eat human hair and shit an oil slick, by all means eat at Lorraine’s. Even as a ‘greasy spoon’ this place fails on such a grand and magnificent scale that it’s hilarious.
(Side note — once my cel phone broke and I went to Lorraine’s to use one of their pay phones. The woman working refused to give me change for a dollar. Beyond the funny ‘bitchy’ that’s advertised, just mean for no reason besides the fact that they simply do NOT want you there.)

I went here on a weekday morning for breakfast. The gal behind the counter was just that… behind the counter… the whole time. «hey, honey! whattlya have?» «I’LL HAVE AN ORDER OF BISCUITS AND GRAVY AND AN ORANGE JUICE!» The only time she left the stool on the counter was to bring me my food. I had to go up to her to ask for the bill and pay her there too!
But I don’t mind that. It was a nice laid back vibe. Plus there was only one other couple in there at the time. The biscuits and gravy was nice and creamy but much too peppery for my liking. The sausage seemed cheap and processed but not bad really. The orange juice came in the smallest can ever too…
Decent prices prices, close, 24 hours. It might be better if I was drunk.
²⁶⁄₅₂

The servers are bitches but the food is great! Is that what their overhang reads? Something to that effect. So upon entering, even if you neglected to look in the window, you should expect some foulness abound.
Pizza Puffs. Don’t knock it until you tried it.
Hashbrowns have that deliciously dirty grease you could never obtain in your own kitchen.
Butter. Anything that comes with butter — toast, pigs in a blanket, pancakes (chocolate chip anyone?) — will come with more butter than you could soak a cow in. Be prepared to scrape. Or ask for a straw and drink it up if that’s your thing.
They also have «red drink» and «orange drink,» though I cannot tell you what the flavor is. I’m not sure anyone could.
50c to carry out an ice water. If you want some greasy spoon coffee on the go, you can pick up a large styro of that as well. A few more dimes is added on anything you carry out. But maybe the tables repel you enough to do so. Most likely, you are in a state that leaves you unaffected by any surrounding filth.
You can sit by the window and stare at everyone waiting for the damen-​chicago bus. Or you can sit at the ‘bar’ like a real man.
You will also find 2 payphones that are frequently occupied– which is awesome when you think that even the tamale man carries a cell phone.
For what this place intends to be, it is perfect. But I will confer only four stars. [a] they only serve biscuits and gravy between the hours of like 2−11am. My hungover stomach will most likely not let me rise before 11, and a hungover stomach with biscuits and gravy is a happier, less hungover stomach.* [b] it is kinda dirty. but in that coming home, mommy loves you sort of way.
*I must add to this: the biscuits and gravy are the best you’ll ever have. They are strangely spicy and even more strangely delicious.