Quantico Bar & Grill

We are told by the front desk staff at the Holiday Inn that the «full service» restaurant is good, she was wrong, oh so wrong. When walking up to the small dining area, there are cloth table clothes, and cloth napkins made into fancy shapes, with a place setting all ready for you to begin your dining experience. But when you sit down, the linens are stained, the silverware is of diner quality, my wife got a salad fork„ and I got a dinner fork, But I just thought «at least one of us will be ready for what comes next» I was wrong. I’m not a dinner snob either, some of the best food is from simple places, but if you are going to be «fancy», be correct. In the elevator as we went to drop off our bags, there were two signs that proclaimed tonights special to be prime rib, and at a reasonable price. I assumed that meant conservative portions but that’s ok. Once who I thought was our waiter brought our limited menus (I’m good with a limited offering, it usually means they only serve what they are really good at) we decided on the prime rib, except the special tonight is not prime rib, it’s bbq ribs. Oh ok, we’ll have the flank steak, medium rare, with tequila shrimp and garlic potatoes. And we’d like the buffalo hot wings as an appetizer. We were literally the only people in the place besides staff. As I watched the staff move around I figured out our waiter is actually the bartender, and the guy who finally introduces himself as our waiter has walked through several times without even looking at us. We saw our waiter about 4 times, and the bartender brought all the food, all the drinks, everything, we were not at the bar. As a waiter our bartender was pretty good, as a bartender, he couldn’t tell me what type of red wines he had… I got him to bring me the merlot, it was bad. I like wine, and I like a good reasonably priced wine when i can find it, they would have done so much better with Liberty Creek over what they were serving, a step above barefoot, but only a half-​step. So one of the times we actually saw our waiter was for him to ask us what side we wanted with our steak, we said the garlic potatoes as was on the menu, alas those too were not available (because making garlic potatoes takes two days prep time?) ok, we’ll have the fries.
We got our buffalo wings, with three slivers of celery, probably equaled one piece of a stalk about 4 inches long. The wings were slightly over, making them a little dry. The buffalo sauce was surprisingly warm, which I liked, but then the after taste hit. The grease was old. Or had not been cleaned, or had been used too long, and the wings tasted like old grease. And the dipping sauce provided in the ramekin, more buffalo sauce, not ranch or blue cheese.
When we got our entrée, the «flank steak» at least that’s what they called it. It was so over cooked it looked like the cook must have had a grudge against the cow. And the cook was a-​n-​g-​r-​y! The shrimp, of which we tasted one, was ever so slightly over, but in my mind was ok, my wife thought it needed a touch more salt but who knows. Our tastebuds had been so assaulted at this point, in the land of the blind, the one-​eyed man is king, and this shrimp may have had an eye. We didn’t eat, we left. The up side, is that there’s an EL Paso just right down the road and their food is excellent!

Employees were nice, but the food took a very long time to come out from the kitchen. Not bad for a hotel bar. I would eat there again if I was staying there.

This place is pretty good. The bar staff was great. They were very friendly and I never had to wait for a drink. The price for a pitcher of beer is the same as buying 3 beers and they amazingly hold exactly three beers. We measured this a few times to be sure.
The kitchen staff could be better. I finally got my appetizers at the end of my meal one night.

The fact of the matter is this place is not so bad. The food is decent, although nothing to write home about. If you’re here on business, it’s not a bad location to stay in comparison to other options in the same vicinity. As a matter of fact pick this place over any of the others. The bar has friendly staff and they are not shy about pouring you a drink. I’d go again.

This is going to hurt me as much as it hurts you, Quantico Bar & Grill, because you and I have developed a special relationship that I’ve never had with a restaurant before. What we have is unique, QB&G. It doesn’t matter that you’re not in Quantico at all, but rather in a Holiday Inn in Dumfries. I don’t care where a restaurant comes from. I’m above that.
But let’s be honest. You are aggressively mediocre. I didn’t even know that Quantico had its own wine, but my life was made no better by this revelation. Towards the end of our time together, I began to dread ordering food from you because I wasn’t sure if it was going to be good, or crummy. I gave you so much benefit of the doubt after that first horrible, mushy crab cake, and you showed me what you can do with jalapeño poppers. But the pasta, the nachos? How could you do that to me?! I loved alfredo sauce! Why did it smell so weird??? Why didn’t you put the nachos in the microwave? I don’t understand!
No matter what you’ve done to me, QB&G, at least we’ll always have caesar salad with grilled shrimp. I can give you that. And it’s pretty hard to mess up french fries, and you haven’t. I will give you that. And who could forget your fantastic servers? I could never fault them for your poor food, these brave souls who work in a Holiday Inn in the middle of nowhere. They go about their proscribed duties with such humor and gravitas.
And the bartenders. I will take the memory of their excellence home with me. The bravado, the rapport we built. The stiff Jack & Cokes after a hard day’s boring work. The happy hour specials. They kept me going, even as I began to despair of ever leaving the hellpit of Dumfries.
When I leave this place, I may never return, but let those who come after me remember, $ 6 pitchers on Tuesday. Have some shrimp. Your time will come.