Ave Maria Singles

Ave and Catholic Match and Catholic Singles are all owned by the same people in Pennsylvania now. They are all a scam. I'm a devout Catholic and was deleted 2x by them bc my headshot photo was too attractive. They assumed I was spam! I'm someone they would want on their site since it's supposed to be for people who practice their faith daily. I reached out, offered more photos and proof and they still deleted me. I believe the woman Geneveive who deleted me has issues of jealousy which is highly unprofessional. I was new there and had chatted with a few men who said they weren't happy with the site but couldn't say anything as their messages were monitored. I found out that is true. I was emailed several times asking for more "proof" of who I was. It's creepy. I also saw a review saying the man purchased his membership and then was deleted. This business is run by incompetents. It's sad when you are trying to find others to share your faith on a site and you get harassed.

I decided to give Ave another try after my first negative review. I started messaging a guy whose profile said he lives in California (one of the four options, as mentioned below) only to just now find out that he really lives in the United Arab Emirates. It is bad enough there are so few members on here without scammers being thrown into the equation.

The site requires you to sign up to see what you are paying for. My first search yielded no results. I then removed all filters except for age (which was a large gap of 20 – 30 yrs), and there were only 4 results. Customer service was not helpful at all and accused me of not being serious in my search. Their email address is even kind of shady (they use
, instead of a professional email domain).

I read some of the other reviews and it reminds me of a similar experience I had with Ave Maria. I subscribed with the lifetime membership (not cheap!), dated some people, and eventually was in a relationship for a while. Eventually the relationship ended and I returned to Ave Maria, but they said I needed to pay a $ 15 re-​activation fee. This is not fair, considering how much the lifetime membership cost. Also, when I first became involved with Ave Maria, I went on a weekend retreat through them which seemed a little steep for what was provided. Maybe it is the going rate, but I don’t know. The thing I disliked the most about Ave Maria was actually a video posted of a priest saying that everyone should get married immediately after college because after «age 30» fertility drops «drastically». Why is a priest, someone in a position of authority, repeating something that so many women obsess over too much already? It is kind of cruel in my opinion. I was 29 when I saw that, and am 33 now and am still trying to forget about that. The priest said people should not put off marriage in order to focus on career or getting finances in order. Who puts off marriage anymore, or, actually, childbearing? With so many daycares and nannies these days, there is no reason to choose between career and children. It is not the 1970s anymore. Chances are these days that people are not single by choice. About finances, it depends… someone should be able to support a child financially. What does the priest expect, for someone to go on welfare? If you can’t feed em don’t breed em. The video was just way out of touch, not to mention offensive. Why was a video like that on a singles site?
The good things about Ave Maria is that there are some serious practicing Catholics on it, and there is an interesting blog (6 Stone Jars). Sometimes that is a little out of touch too, but for the most part, it is ok. Also, all the videos have since been taken down.

I should start the review by saying that I met my husband through the site which is why the rating is as high as it is. This was after using other sites such as Catholic Match and EHarmony without much success or positive experiences.
As a «serious» practicing Catholic (I hate when people use that phrase but I’m not sure how else to describe it) I knew that I wanted the same in a spouse. I had been on other sites where there were a lot of Catholics in name only. That was not the case on here. In fact, some people seem to view themselves as more Catholic then the Pope… Anyway, The folks on the site forked over quite a bit of money compared to other dating sites. Although when I add up what I spent on
, catholic match etc over the years, it probably was more then I payed for this lifetime membership.
The downside to this site is that there are not a lot of members. This is because the target demographic is somewhat small and because of the cost. For example, when I first searched profiles in the area I lived, there were about 6 matches and all were guys I already knew and wasn’t a match with. I also believe the site lists total members instead of total active members. So technically my husband and I are still members even though we are married and our profiles not active.
I would give the site 5 stars if they found a way to attract more quality members in order to increase people’s chances of meeting their future spouse.

I have been a member of the site for several years. Via conversations with staff at the site, I learned the old website had to be replaced with a new one as old one was collapsing. The website now is being manned by very few people and the super inexpensive price charged to belong also means that the site people can’t afford a lot that may be offered at other dating sites. The site is having growing pains. I have had difficulty with getting new pictures up for one, but the staff has been assisting me. This site does attract many excellent people as I’ve experienced in person and on line. I’d recommend reasonable patience for the staff to respond to any difficulties having. I am a fan of the site and what they are trying to do, and would recommend people give the site and staff a chance.

It feels rather strange to be writing a negative review of Ave Maria Singles, given that I met my wife through this online service ten years ago. However, my recent interaction with them has compelled me to warn other Catholics who are still single about the risks of buying a membership with them today.
A couple of weeks ago, I logged into my Ave Maria Singles account for the first time in a long while. I noticed that their website had changed considerably, and I also noticed that all of the messages that were in my Inbox had disappeared. Given that those messages (three or four of them) were the first communication between me and my wife, I wanted to have access to those once again. Since membership in Ave Maria Singles is a lifetime deal, I figured that this would not be a problem. I contacted Ave Maria Singles through e-​mail about this, and received a quick reply saying that their technical team would restore my messages promptly. So far, so good. However, later that day, I received a second message from them, saying that they would restore my messages AFTER I sent them information that they could share with others in the «Success Stories» section of their site, where couples who met through Ave Maria and got married post photos, engagement and marriage dates, sentimental quotes, and other information about themselves. Needless to say, I found this rather disturbing. Why should Ave Maria refuse to restore my messages — which came with a lifetime membership that I purchased — unless I first provide private info about myself and my wife for the sake of Ave Maria’s advertising? I wrote them back, politely explained my concerns, and asked that my messages be restored without any such strings attached. I received no response to that message, nor to any of the several subsequent e-​mails that I sent. To me, this sort of behavior on the part of Ave Maria Singles is petty, childish, and unprofessional. I have seen other reviews of Ave Maria Singles online that refer to similar experiences: dishonest and petty behavior on the part of Ave Maria, followed by zero response to e-​mails. To me, this really calls into question their seriousness about promoting good, healthy, Catholic marriages. If this is how Ave Maria treats customers, how much do its operators really understand what needs to go into a successful marriage?
I must add something else for those considering Ave Maria. Just out of curiosity, I did a search for women ages 34 to 41 in the same state where I did my searching ten years ago. This time, I came up with a grand total of eight hits. Eight is not a very large number at all for an entire state with a population of almost six million. What especially struck me, though, is that I recognized a couple of these people, for they came up in my searches ten years ago! Now, I am not judging any of them. Maybe they’re still searching, or maybe they found spouses and forgot to deactivate their Ave Maria accounts. Regardless, it’s not a good sign for people looking for spouses on Ave Maria. They advertise that they have had over two thousand marriages take place among members, but that is for all fifty states plus foreign countries, over a period of fifteen years. From that perspective, two thousand isn’t that high a number (if all occurred in the U.S., that would be fewer than three per state per year). I have no experience with any other online Catholic singles sites and so I would not know what to recommend today as an alternative, but my guess is that Catholic singles today will have a better chance of success elsewhere, especially given the sort of pettiness that I have seen recently from this company.
I would consider deleting this review if Ave Maria would simply do the honest, fair thing and make this situation right. To hold hostage messages sent between two members who later got married — just so that Ave Maria could get some more advertising power — isn’t much of a reflection of Christian charity, and certainly doesn’t represent what Catholics should be seeking and practicing in marriage.
UPDATE: Yesterday, I sent a copy of this review to Ave Maria Singles so that they could have another chance to fix the situation before I posted this review. This time, I received a quick reply, and a brief exchange followed. Unfortunately, the messages that I received today did not include any acknowledgment of the fact that I had been required to submit a «Success Story» before having access to old messages (I was told that I «misinterpreted» their earlier message, despite the fact that their message was very clear and explicit) or of the fact that I had not received a response to anything over the following nine days. I was also told that my account would be suspended (apparently, I violated their policy by running the search that I mentioned above!), but that they could still obtain my old messages for me anyways if I would agree to pay an extra fee. Wow.

Well, I was very excited about this site at first. It is endorsed by some high-​profile Catholics that I certainly trust. So, I forked out the dough to get a membership. Unfortunately, there are very few active users. I thought that maybe I needed to simply wait a bit, and the user base would grow. This has not been the case. Also, I have, on a few occasions written them emails over concerns or with questions, and they do not at all respond to any questions, concerns or inquiries. If you are looking for a good Catholic mate, I would venture elsewhere. This site is a rip off, and the customer service is non-​existent.