Teberio’s Pizzeria

My fat roommate who used to wear the robe and I have always been astonished that no one we know has ever eaten at this establishment. It became something of a running gag, over the long summer nights, as we discussed what could possibly be in store for the people that made the unholy pilgrimage to Luzerne to embark on the tasty roller coaster that was the Teberio’s of our minds.
We finally entered our own minds, about a week ago. Dropping into the eating experience as though we were in the back-​half of a 1970’s X-​men comic where Professor X was able to use his legs while visiting the astral plane (For non comic readers: the Astral Plane is a metaphorical level of existence with ties to the physical world which only psychic entities can visit) We moved about the box of pizza, offered in a baker’s dozen, weary of what was in store.
Unsure if the satisfying taste and crisp edges were a figment of the imagination, some sort of manifestation of all our hopes and dreams to be the first pioneers to bestow the mighty power of Teberio’s upon mouths, and with those same mouths spread it’s gospel to our friends and loved-​ones.
My girlfriend, who has become an even pickier eater — reduced to cans of unsalted artichokes and tomato basil flavored Bumblebee Tuna, like some sort of cartoon cat who holds her elitist food taste over the heads of lasagna loving Garfield, or the whole raw fish consuming Heathcliffe, confirmed our beliefs when she too gave Teberio’s a gold star review. Her taste buds consumed flavor, she had not experienced in months.
Mocha, our pug jack Russel terrier chihuahua, was not disappointed either. Her food habits are a dog’s, however, and I do not put much salt into what she does and does not like. However she did not like the sweet potato treats I got her from Walgreen’s Today.
I’ve since gone fourth in the days after and spread the word of Teberio’s, at every chance I get, telling friend after friend of the small — far off place, that felt like a dream and became a reality.
Teberio’s has taught me a lesson, sometimes patience is not a virtue, I should have gone months ago.
As my girlfriends said to me in the car: «Don’t get your hopes up.»
to which I responded «I won’t… never mind, I already have.»
And they have remained so: up, up, up — near the astral plane where Professor X walked again,