Andresen’s

Commonly called The Dead Animal Bar! But it’s really about Helga. The best bartendress on the planet and an awfully nice lady to boot!
Uncle Stanley

I drive hours to come here. Mostly because HELGA is the BEST bartender. Ever.
BUT, Miss Andresen! PLEASE GET HOOKS FOR UNDER YOUR BAR SEATS!!! Us very well-​paying patrons, with nice purses, DONT LIKE leaving them on the floor. I’ll even buy the hooks and install them for you. PLEASE?! And Helga is priceless. I’d never come here if it weren’t for her. Just FYI.

Can see why this is a local favorite. Great dive bar. Jukebox fantastic. Helga the bartender has been slinging drinks in this joint for 35 years. A great spot to meet the regulars and take out of towners.

The best real Petaluma bar in Petaluma. Some call it the dead animal bar. Filled with taxidermy and guns on the walls. Great song selection on the jute box. Lovely original booths and tables. Such a great bar! Go for beer, shots and old school drinks but not for a hipster mixologist or wine.

wow! this place is insane. a throwback bar filled with amazing taxidermy collection. Helga the bartender is great. i would give it 5 stars if it had a few more craft beers on tap. looks closed from the outside. go in. incredible. the photos posted will not do it justice. not to be missed!

There are a lot of 4 star and 5 star reviews stating what a great dive bar Andresen’s is. And, sure, it’s sort of a dive bar in regards to the ambience (which is «dive bar» quirky) and the quality of drinks (which is «dive bar» poor). But when you get to the price of those poor drinks, Andresen’s sees itself as a top tier elite bar. Now I get dive bars. I was visiting them regularly before the Hipsters discovered what the initials PBR even stood for. Andresen’s has a lot to offer. A lot of history, really interesting and unique décor from the floors to the ceilings. But I ordered a Whiskey Sour an called out my preferred brand so I knew it would bump up the price a tad. That drink ran me $ 7. Now it was mixed in the glass, not a shaker, in true dive bar tradition. But the glass was the size of one of those paper cups they put your pain killer in when you’re in the hospital. So it was thimble sized. I almost laughed until I realized the depressed bartender was seriously going to serve me a drink in one of those things. My buddy ordered a long island…$ 10. That’s more (or on par) than you’d pay at Graffiti’s, Trader Vics, Bix in SF and so on. And those are well crafted cocktails. I didn’t order a brew, but hopefully those are a bit more realistically priced. If so, I’d recommend sticking to beer and get a cocktail at another spot where your money will get you better quality and the staff will actually crack a smile once in awhile. Also, stay away from the juke box! Again, the high tech wifi interactive juke box isn’t the norm for a true dive bar, and this one loves to eat your money while never playing the songs you paid for. We dropped a ton a dough in that thing and it played the first 3 out of 12 songs. But as soon as someone else dropped some coinage in, it went into some weird shuffle mode and we only heard one of our prepaid songs during the next hour. So I’d say drop in for a quick beer and a look around and then head to the Buckhorn for a true dive bar experience. Or just go to McNears where they are actually happy to see you!

I was bored, and decided to do the dive bar walking circuit today… Andresens, Hideaway, Gales… when I walked into Andresen’s a little after 4 pm this afternoon, i was the only patron, I was greeted by a lady tending bar who was pleasant and who mixed a pretty decent beverage… bars are or at least were, man caves. Places like this, Fosters Bighorn in Rio Vista, or The French Bar in Gardnerville, Nevada exemplify this. Animals, dead animals that have likely been killed by men with rifles or bow and arrow adorn the walls. Nothing sad or tragic about this, this is life and death, and we will all face it sooner or later… bless the ownership that says tradition is good, let’s leave well enough alone. Great décor, a respectable no bullshit cocktail and a professional, seasoned bartender…

Best bar in Petaluma and Helga is the best bartender in Petaluma.
They have PBR on tap!
They have PBR on tap!
They have PBR on tap!
Wine you ask? Bahahahahahahaahahahahaahhahahaha…
I dare you to ask Helga about their vintage wines…

Andresen’s is what I love in a bar, but it’s perhaps not for everyone. I have been here a handful of times, and had a blast each time. One time involved a small group, lots of beer and gimlets, loud conversation and making random friends; another time it was three of us and quieter conversation; you get the picture — it totally depends on the night and the company.
Helga, as everyone seems to have noted, is a trip. The décor is eclectic. The drink prices are average. Cash only. (Relax. There’s a Chase around the corner and a BoA three blocks away.) You can buy a flask or nip of something to go, if you are so inclined.
I love that even when it’s full, it’s never crowded. I love that there is space to sit and space to stand. I love that the music is from a jukebox. I love that it’s a mix of curmudgeonly old timey locals and various young folks. I love that the place is as clean and spotless as it was when it was decorated back in 1960 or whenever. I love that while everyone there seems to be having a good time, I’ve not yet seen anyone get sloppy or out of control (though I’m sure it happens on occasion). Overall, my fav bar in Petaluma.

Cute place. The family that owns it is hugely into trophy hunting, though. It’s sad to see all the beautiful dead animals on the wall. I’d rather not support that sort of behavior.

Simply put, Andresen’s is the best bar in Petaluma. Never will you have to concern yourself with «am I dressed ok for this place» or «will the regulars give me a hard time.» Helga is by far the most generous bartender in town, making cocktails the way you would make them at home. It’s not dark and creepy like the outside might suggest, and it is kept immaculately clean. I’ve personally seen people go from «I’m never coming here again» after only being there a few minutes to «This is my favorite bar in town.»

They have PBR on tap. What more could you ask for?
Seriously though, this is a chill, unpretentious oasis in Petaluma.
As long as you’re not put off by the hundreds of stuffed/​mounted animals on the wall & the photo of the last lynching in Sonoma County on the cash register, then you’ll love Andresen’s. If you are, then… well you’re probably no fun to drink with anyway.
Good jukebox, great bartenders, and CASH ONLY.

Definitely not for typical city-​folk– but that’s the appeal. :)
Bartender Helga makes my day; love coming to this true hole-​in-​the-​wall establishment for a chill evening.
Oh yah, and Helga’s SPICY Bloody Mary is the best I’ve had. (Don’t ask for it spicy if you can’t handle it. You’ve been forewarned.)

Andresen’s is a slice of the old Petaluma. If you’re new to town, you’ll probably hate it. If you grew up here, you’ll be heartened to see that it’s the same people in here that you used to see outside smoking when you were a kid, plus those of us who grew up and wanted to drink at a place of the caliber of Andresen’s.
Helga is great-​I get a warning look when I start shenanigans, and great service when I behave. One of my stand-​by bars, as it lacks the BS that seems to run through most bars in Petaluma.

Established in 1934, Andresen’s is the real deal.
This is not a bar for the timorous. It is definitely a friendly establishment, and Helga behind the bar is a lovely lady who will just as easily have a chat with you as she would probably show you the door by the scruff of your neck if you act up and get any funny ideas. The few patrons who were there when we walked in seemed like regulars and were also pleasant company. In fact, it sort of felt like walking into someone’s living room – if that house were a bar and the owner liked displaying old guns and taxidermy animals. Don’t worry. They’re all dead and won’t bite. There doesn’t seem to be anything in Andresen’s that would bite – unless you decide to act up and get any funny ideas.

So the stuffed mounted animals, upstairs ladies only bathroom, and Euro-​tough bartender lady and guns all over are NOT scary.
However, I found the ominous doors scary and the number one scary thing in Andresens is… THE PHOTO OF 3 DEAD WOMEN ON THE CASH REGISTER — BEING HUNG… BY NOOSES… it doesn’t matter that its black and white and the ladies are wearing clothing from the early 1900s. THAT IS CREEPY MAN!
oh you can buy full bottles of liquor here. and DO NOT turn around when at the bar bc there is a stuffed turtle up there and I ALMOST started crying.

This is a dive. And I really hate dives. If you like dives and you are in Petaluma, go here. And if you come back saying you didn’t like it, then you aren’t into dives. You are into Mission bars that like to pretend they are dives.
Seriously, this is on caliber with Club 93. Where regulars and old men hang out. But hey, if you want the gossip from town I’m sure you can find some here. The gossip in this town travels through the old men that knew each other from high school.

As a seasoned veteran of bars, I feel qualified to say that this is one of the best true watering holes still in existence. There’s something here for everyone, from the beginning boozer to the grizzled, salty saucer.
I swear, that mountain lion on the wall is looking right at me.

I am no drinker; bars are strictly for people watching. I love this place. I’d be as happy to bring my parents as I am to bring my friends or husband or my awesome brother. There are a million things to look at, strangers treat you like a neighbor, Helga is the perfect bartender, and the juke box has something for everyone. The drinks aren’t overpriced and don’t include fruit garnishes. They have good old PBR and some familiar brand of Pale Ale or IPA on tap (I obviously go for the Pabst). You can buy your favorite liquor by the bottle to take home, which is neat.
There are no creeps. There is no karaōke. People wear normal clothes.
Best bar ever.

This is the only place I go drinking when I visit the hometown of P-​E-​T-​A-​L-​U-​M-​A. All the college students with fake IDs and 40 year old football has-​beens can drink their Zemas at McNears, but the real Petaluma locals pony up to Andresen’s.
There is a definite hunting theme in the décor. Lots of taxidermy heads on the wall, including a bison and a VERY angry elk (He did not like his demise). My favorite is the squirrel. Make sure you look for him. In the past he was on a cell phone but recently he has been holding a can of beer. There are also guns, shackles, signs and other forms of wacky bric-​à-​brac. The jukebox is filled with your dive-​friendly regulars, lots of Eagles, Frank Sinatra, etc. People will sing if drunk enough.
Let me describe some of the patrons. Serious drinkers. Very eclectic. Ranges in age from 21 to almost in the grave. On one evening, I remember coming in and seeing an old High School classmate, my former babysitter (realize I am 30+ now), my brother and my Uncle and his hunting buddies. This is the type of bar where generations of a family would go to get snockered. Some of the old-​school bartenders just retired, but even they remembered my grandfather drinking there in the olden days. Now I go with my Mom.
Oh, and here is the best part. THEY SELL LIQUOR TO GO. Yes! You can buy a bottle and go along your merry way. Ya wanna take the party home– no problem!