Meaner Wiener

Hot dogs are like anal sex.
It’s not something you want often, or tend to engage in on any type of a regular basis, but sometimes every once in a while you just get an urge to have intimate relations with that special someone in that most uncomfortable of uncomfortable places (and I’m not referring to the back of a Volkswagen).
And just like butt bumping love, hot dogs seem to be enjoyed best when heavily intoxicated.
(clarify: I’m a giver /​not a receiver)
Plus once you get your fill, that’s usually going to do you for some time, because when you really think about the whole (hole) process, you might even think it is gross.
Friday afternoon I was not drunk… nor randy, but found myself unexpectedly craving some good old fashioned tube o’ mystery meat for lunch. Meaner Weiner to the rescue. This new cart in Sellwood is good, offering different Zener dogs with multiple toppings.
Now this isn’t some hot dog in a hall way type of loosely ran, let’s boil up some Ballpark franks operation; this is quality dogs grilled to order full of flavor with great toppings. Nor did I detect this wiener to be overly mean or aggressive, although I may not have confirmation on its true demeanor until it is fully digested.
Enjoyable? Yes. Cravings satisfied? Some of them.

This cart hasn’t been open for long. The people who run it also have a small place in Hillsboro by the same name. This was one of the most impressive first visits to a place…
The service was incredible. I wasn’t actually in the mood for anything other than Bruce Lee’s Tofu Pad Thai but I was interested in the newcomer and poked around the cart, looking at the menu. I was greeted by a very friendly guy who was welcoming and outgoing. He convinced my guy and me that we should try a Pancho’s Wiener the next time we are in the area. We couldn’t wait that long.
The dog was incredible… Perfectly cooked, toasted bun, melted Tillamook, pico, guac, and a spicy sour cream. Very well balanced flavor. I couldn’t think of anything else it needed.
The price was incredible. I wish I could give six stars for the price we paid for such outstanding flavor and customer service. Pancho’s Wiener was only $ 4! The owner told me that he is going to raise the price by 50 cents because the guacamole he supplies specifically for this wiener is pricey (I can’t remember if he buys it or makes it himself). Still, it is a great deal and I won’t hesitate to order it again even with the slight price increase!
I was incredibly impressed on this visit (as if you couldn’t tell) and I am excited to return. The only problem is now I have to choose between Bruce Lee’s and here. or not… Pad Thai keeps pretty well!

Good dog! Stay.
I happened upon this cart today while grabbing a quick lunch before an appt down the street.
This dog-​purveying cart is new in the 13^th & Lexington cart pod in Sellwood, right next to Curbside Grill. They apparently also have a location in downtown Hillsboro, right next to the MAX station.
They have a half-​dozen different sausages and hot dogs, all of these being locally made by Zenner’s.
I tried the Pancho’s dog, which was a pork sausage with jalapenos and cheddar, served on a nice toasted bun with shredded cheddar and grilled onions (all optional). They also have few different unusual condiments, such as a sweet mustard and a «guacamole» (really more of an avocado mayo sort of thing.)
How’d it taste? Like spicy, gooey cheesy yumminess, wrapped in a perfectly snappy casing. It was $ 4, and worth every penny.
The guy working the window was super friendly and chatty, explained all the available options and generally made me feel like he was making the dog to my exacting specifications.