DPW--Trash and Recycling Service

My FIRST exposure to DPW was bringing my moving-​related recycling out to the Fort Totten Transfer Station. That was a joy, and Unilocal feedback confirms it.
I assumed (erroneously) that I could pay for my bins online or on the phone and get them a bit earlier (the guys out at Fort Totten graciously said they couldn’t handle that function too – it made sense to me that there would be an office there where I could fill out forms, etc.).
So I called 311 just now and got connected very quickly to the correct woman, who said «you can’t pay on line or on the phone; you need to mail them a check.» But rather than allow me to say «OK, I’ll go handle it all by mail,» she asked me a series of questions (address, name, did I know my pickup schedule (I did as I’d looked it up very easily on line last week, etc.).
I said «can’t I just handle this all with one note by mail?» and she basically said no, we force you to endure a two-​step process – you need to talk to me and give me all this info, and then you need to mail the check and give them all the same info all over again.
It really can’t be that complicated. I should be able to sign up for service on line at the same time I’m signing up for ALL MY OTHER UTILITIES online – Wash Gas, PEPCO, Comcast, security system, etc. etc. etc. You’d get your money faster from many of your clients (and you could allow those without computers to go down to the office or continue the mail-​in process). But really, this is a complete waste of everyone’s time (DC staff’s as well as your customers’) and it means that you have a lot of people bypassing service and dealing with their own trash – for free. E.g., I’m going to be dropping off my trash and recycling at the Fort Totten station for the next month or so, and you aren’t going to be getting payment from me during that time.
Please, fix this process. It’s the FIRST interaction newcomers have with the DC government (you need garbage before you need car registration…).