Broadway Video

[This is the story of how AA-​Batteries and a Gentle Indian Man at the Porn Shop all came together in my life this week.]
This place is a GIFT FROM THE CREATOR HIMSELF.
Nevermind that one dollar gets you FULL FOUR MINUTES of channel-​changing porno fun in one of a dozen bleach-​scented, disgusting little arcade booths showing a rotation of 123 DVD’s any given night (I squatted on top of the seat to avoid contaminating the medically sterile field I maintain around my bum.)
I kept feeding dollars into this TV because a girl on a DVD cover looked EXACTLY like my coworker, but with dark hair. I had to investigate, but I wasn’t about to spring $ 35 for the DVD (pregnant porn fetches a pretty penny). After a few bills her part STILL didn’t come up, so in the interest of my wallet I postponed the quest for future interweb’ing.
In any event, I had come here to browse the toys and mags on a promise to the very nice Indian gentleman running the place that I would return and repay his kindness with my patronage. You see, last week I desperately needed AA batteries at 2am for my RC truck, and every liquor store charged the price of a microbrew six-​pack for four friggin batteries…
(I needed 10 batteries. That’s a lot of beer in my mind!)
And this is how a porn shop saved the day. Even though the goods were not factory-​sealed and were loosely brown-​bagged, they cost me half as much but lasted throughout my photoshoot. And I had money left over for beverages.
Scout’s Honor, I walked out of Broadway Video Arcade with my brown bag singin «AH-​MERR-​EE-​CUHH… FUCK YEAH!!!»