Palisades Pizzeria & Clam Bar

In all fairness, I cannot say anything about the food. This review is about the service. I am from New England and was craving fried clams, so I did a quick internet search on where to get them in DC. I called this place after looking at their website, which states ON THE HOME PAGE that they deliver, with an encouraging «call today!» They provide two numbers, and upon calling the first, I got a woman who tried to claim that they don’t deliver. I politely informed her that I was currently staring at their web page, which boldly states the opposite. She then tried to claim that the delivery people «weren’t working.» At 6:30 on a weeknight? Doubt it. But, I gave her the benefit of the doubt and asked if she knew when they’d be back. Her response? «No.» click. I then called the other number, hoping to get someone who wasn’t a moron, and was relieved to hear a different voice answer. Upon asking the same question about a delivery order, the man immediately claims I’m out of range. I tell him I’m staring at the webpage, which clearly states that my zip code is, in fact, within their service range. He still tries to argue with me, but at this point he’s just been so rude that I’m not going to let him off the hook. He finally snaps, «FINE,» and asks what I want. Before I can get more than I few words out, he cuts me off with «WE’RE OUT OF CLAMS» and a very insincere «sorry.» For all this jerk knew, I could have been ordering $ 100 worth of food and, had he been politer, I may have kept my order. Perhaps I would have better luck getting served if I came in for lunch, but after reading the reviews of how disgusting both the food and the restaurant are, I doubt very much I’d ever be that desperate. So, I have to back the other previous views I’ve read: how the hell does this place stay in business?

So sorry but this place is soooooo DIRTY it makes my skin crawl. Bathrooms are deplorable. Otherwise decent prices and decent pizza. Could be good if they renovate and get a cleaning person.

I’ve tried both pizza (two types) and sandwiches from this place, and while it’s convenient from where I live and therefore on the list when I’m hungry and don’t have anywhere else to go, I wouldn’t make it a point to eat there unless it was my only option. As others have pointed out, it’s not the cleanest place, and the counter-​side manner of the staff is less than charming. You’ll get your food, but don’t expect a smile or a thank you. Finally, I don’t know where you have to go to find pepperoni with absolutely no flavor, but these guys have done it.

This may be the worst restaurant in Washington. The pizza is not good and the place is beyond filthy. Pop in and look at the bathroom if you need proof. Worst of all the owner has a horrible negative attitude. Congratulations to Palisades Pizza for pulling off a trifecta: horrible food, horrible setting and horrible service. Can’t be easy.

Gross. Super gross. How can a place screw up pizza so badly? I live nearby and decided to try it out– stopped by on a Wednesday at 5:30pm and ordered two slices to go– a cheese and a mushroom– spinach. They pizzas on the counter looked like they had been sitting out all day but I assumed I would be served fresh pizza from the oven– nope. She served my pieces from the display case. I tasted the cheese, it went right in the trash. I didn’t even bother trying the mushroom and spinach pizza.
Also– the whole restaurant is extremely dirty. I won’t be back.

Great pizza, but mostly takeout.

Kellogg’s should really bring a law suit if this place is going to use their Eggo Waffles, burn them, label them «Belgian», and then charge $ 5.00 for something defrosted and available next door at Safeway. The lady was rude when I asked for syrup, she told me they were out and acted very burdened to get honey instead. I also ordered a side of bacon for $ 1.75 that never made into the box. After reading the review on here, I guess I should feel lucky since the bacon sits out pre-​made all day– I also could have been chased out of the store by the angry owner as appears to be habit when someone complains. Total rip off. No pride AT ALL in their food. sent a complaint but I doubt anything will be done when standard are already so low. Gordon Ramsey is their only hope.

Ok, I live in the neighborhood and have tried to give this place a shot numerous times. I went the other day with my dad and it’s just not good. I got a slice of the square pizza and it just sucked. He tried the hot dog wrapped in dough and said it was gross but it looked bad so I wasn’t shocked.
Who knows how long the pizza sits out there as well?
I witnessed a gentleman ask for a refund on his soup since it was cold and tasteless. I also witnessed the owner snap/​yell at a patron for walking in and using the bathroom before ordering.
I don’t understand how this place can stay in business. I had a Reuben there about a month ago and it was soggy, salty and not very good. They say they make the corned beef in house?
It would be nice if the place was cleaner as well. It’s in such a great spot and it’s disappointing to see such a bad place there.
I’m sorry to be negative but it’s really not good or a nice environment.

Abusive owner with an anger mgt problem. I have been yelled at and seen others yelled at. Very strange behavior for a business owner.

I hate myself right now.
A coworker loves PP’s Sicilian ‘za and was heading that direction for a slice. Since I didn’t have lunch, I decided to accompany her. I already knew from several experiences that I’m not a fan of PP’s pies — so I ordered clams. It’s a pizzeria and clam bar, after all.
SEVENTEEN DOLLARS and FIFTEEN MINUTES later, I’m handed a to-​go box of MINCED fried clams. Minced. Fried Clams. Having spent summers with my grandparents in Rhode Island, I know my way around a fried clam platter. I’ve eaten my fair share of these beautiful bivalves. But I’ve never seen such a thing as MINCED fried clams.
The result of frying MINCED clams was three times as much breading as clams. The clam pieces that *were* there were gritty. And something tasted thoroughly acrid — old fry oil??? The whole thing was inedible, and I dropped 17 freaking dollars on it.
Not to mention that the woman working the register was exceptionally curt and dismissive.
I won’t be back.
Off to self-​flagellate.

I live within walking distance of the Palisade’s Pizzeria and Clam Bar, so one day, after walking by it a million times and smelling what I thought was tasty pizza, I decided it was time to give it a try.
The place is pretty run-​down and shabby. There are some fancy fish in dirty looking, old tanks.
When you’re ready to place your order, the owner gruffly asks «Who’s next?» without making eye contact, though the place might be empty.
I come from the New York area, home of the best pizza in the US, so this couldn’t hold a candle to what I’m used to. The slices are big, but the dough is really bland and overpowering, the sauce and cheese tasteless.
And what really cheesed me was that I paid ELEVEN DOLLARS for two slices and a small soda. WAY too expensive for the quality of the food, cleanliness of the restaurant, and lack of people skills possessed by the owner.

WOW, it’s amazing this place stays in business. I live really close to Palisades Pizza and before writing this Unilocal I decided to give it a few tries. So first lets talk about the Pizza… actually not thaaaat bad. Its your basic NY style grease thin crust. I’ve had worse (read palisade’s other pizza place. listranies) but for where the PP is its pretty blah. The slices are good in a If-i-were-in-college-f’d-up-at-2:00am-just-after-last-call-Good. But not in a up-​scale neighborhood, over priced slices good. So thats the food. What makes this place bad as other Unilocalers have mentioned is the service and cleanlyness.
The employees look as if they are human traffic victims chained to the counter and not getting paid… seriously people, how about a smile. Last time i was there our pizza was given to this rude New Yorker and the lady at the counter did not even say sorry-​bout-​that. The top it off moment was when we were eating at around 7:30/8:00 and the same woman that served my food decided to break down the kitchen early (note they close at 10) and take the manky rubber mats out from behind the line out for the night, only taking them out meant stacking them in front of our booth and splashing my leg, booth, 1year old and 3 year old with matt spouge… when i commented on it the lady just shrugged her shoulder smiled and disappeared into the back. And there it is Unilocalers, the only smile i ever got at Palisade Pizza.

I’d give them a 2.5. I’d been here before and been underwhelmed, so when Groupon offered a deal, it was a good opportunity to give it another try. The offer was for a large 1 topping pizza, and we asked for half pepperoni, half sausage. Enough cheese but the toppings were SKIMPY. Overall the pizza was pretty decent, we’d give it a 7 out of 10 — not great, but solid. But they charged us for 2 toppings! When I (pleasantly) said, we asked for half and half, the lady said, that’s two toppings. I said that she should have told us, and proceeded to pay. The owner pipes up … he says, that’s how it is in every pizza place, and not very friendly like, either. I’ve been to a lot of pizza places and when you ask for half and half, it’s always been counted as 1. ½ +½ = 1, right? Given the scant quantity of toppings, it was odd they charged us for two.
So the food is decent, but that’s about it. Well, they do have a cool aquarium with some really nice, big fish. Management and staff could be more helpful and friendly. After all, if the whole point of Groupon is to get people to try out your place and come back, it seems they’ve missed the boat. Our experience here doesn’t give us much motivation to become regulars. Listrani’s, just down the street, is better, less expensive and they’re nice.

It’s interesting that a week after my family and I ate here, my review was «filtered,» which is another way of saying, «censored.» Apparently, Unilocal filters reviews that it believes are sent in by robots but I can’t imagine anyone believing my review was written by a robot. Here it is again from a real, living human being:
We have a few toddlers and we all tend to go to pizza joints — Angelicos, Two Amys, Listrani, Ledos and we’re always looking for something interesting and new. Unfortunately, Palisades Pizza was not that place.
I brought the family here and we were very disappointed… you’re all right — the owner or whomever that guy is at the front is unfriendly and should not be dealing with people.
This is the first time I’ve ever ordered a pizza that had virtually no mozzarella — I’m not exaggerating — they really skimp… and I noticed the slices of pizza had more cheese on them. The salad was ok and pasta was passable.
I took my toddlers to the bathroom to wash their hands — don’t go in the bathroom except under extreme duress.
We walked out and my two-​year-​old almost walked into two giant pots filled with dirty water sitting on the floor between the bathroom and kitchen — gross and dangerous.
If there was a rating below one star, I would have selected it.
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The four stars is heavily tilted toward the warm and welcoming service, not the lukewarm, reheated slices that had no zing to them. Based on food alone it was 2.5
I came in to this nice little mom and pop joint dripping with sweat after biking 17 miles to get there. Sounds excessive, but I had a Groupon, and food is always tastier when it’s earned on the hills of upper NW. The manager immediately gave me his attention. I was starving so I just glanced at the already cooked pies and asked for two slices of peperoni. I was a bit nervous about paying with the Groupon, as I use the iphone app, and wasn’t sure they would be cool with it. The manager though just seemed excited I was redeeming it. He then offered me to sign up for his mailing list for coupons and such. I later heard him telling other customers how the Groupon was a big success for them.
My slices came out pretty quickly, and I tore into them. I couldn’t really taste them though. I haven’t burned my tongue lately, and the soda tasted right so it must’ve been the bland sauce and cheese they used. I ate every bite regardless, as I was intending to bike up 49^th and cross over all the hills to get to Woodley Park, and I needed the energy. I was disappointed with the lack of strong pizza flavor. They certainly didn’t taste bad, but I had trouble discerning one ingredient from the other. They had an expansive menu, and I would definitely come back to try a sandwich or something when I’m out that way. The restaurant was clean, quiet, and had outdoor seating which was all in use on this gorgeous February day. It’s located along a strip of businesses with metered parking available. The manager said he was working on revamping the store’s website to offer special deals. It seems like he is committed to growing the business via Web 2.0.
Total cost for two big as your head slices and a diet coke, would’ve been 11 bucks, but I only had to fork up 1 dollar since I had the groupon.

One of the better pizza places in DC.
Atmosphere here is nothing special.
And I think its $ 5 a slice which is quite high.

After reading Jim C’s review I got the joneses for fried clams and made plans to head here for lunch… It was a definite buzz kill to learn they were out of clams!!!
I ordered the steak and cheese sub w/​fries and it was as advertized sirloin beef on a warm sub roll with cheese, onions, and peppers. The fries were thin and greasy (not a bad thing).
I liked the idea that they had garlic powder and hot sauce on the tables to spice things up! Most folks were ordering pizza slices for lunch and traffic was brisk. I may have to return to try their pizza!!!

Pretty good NY-​style slices and pies. Only tried the pizza. Worth going if you are in the area but I would not drive across town for it. Looking forward to trying the fried clams.

Closest thing to New York/​New Jersey pizza by the slice that you will find in DC. Choose from the classics, such as pepperoni, sausage, mushroom, or such toppings as spinach and ricotta. The interior is purely functional: naugahyde booths and a few stools in the front. No waiter service: you go up to the counter and order. Apparently they once had draft beer, but no longer, just bottles of the usual suspects. And as the name implies, they do serve fried clams!

I LOVE this pizza!
If you can get there before 5 (hard I know!) their slices are ½ off! The sausage pizza here is delicious! There are always about 6 – 8 different pizzas to chose from for your slice (chicken, veggie, meats, peperoni, white, etc). You can also have full pizzas made, but the slices always look so good I’ve never done that! In addition their Lemonade is spectacular.
Sadly I don’t live down the street anymore so its hard to get here.